The Journey Home
by soaper410
Summary: Suppose Rayna/Deacon are still all angsty and headed for tour. The difference is Liam didn't betray Rayna and is going out with her on tour. This is a Deacon/Rayna Story.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a little something about Deacon/Rayna and where they are right now. Spoilers up to 1X11. Hope you enjoy. Comments are greatly appreciated.  
**

**Denver **

Deacon smirked at Juliette's constant whining about how early it was. _ She really wasn't a morning person. _Juliette's manager had booked several radio stations in Denver, one of which included an interview with him too. While Juliette went to see if their car was ready, he wondered around the lobby. The place was fairly empty minus a few guys in business suits. _Most of the guest were still asleep at this hour_.

He turned around to see Rayna about fifty away, walking into the front door. She was still in the dress she'd worn the night before, the silver dress which showed way too much cleavage. _Not that I actually mind the cleavage but damn if she needed to show it everyone. _And she had a baseball cap her head.

He watched the way she took a few steps and then spun around laughing back at the front door. He could hear her voice but couldn't make out any of the words. A second later Liam stumbled through the front door, seeming to trip over his own feet. Rayna ran to catch him but nearly fell herself in the process. She leaned against the wall to catch her breath as she laughed. _She's drunk. She's drunk and she's been out all night with him._

Deacon slowly walked closer as Rayna and Liam headed away from him and down the hall. Deacon let go of the breath he'd been holding as Rayna got onto one elevator and Liam kept walking down the hall. With a backwards glance he headed back towards the rest of Juliette's entourage.

**W-DEN Studio**

Deacon cracked an annoyed smile as the DJ brought up the magazine article. Deacon denied drinking but admitted it was for the best that he was back at home "in country music." Juliette echoed that "country music was glad to have him back."

The DJ was some young kid with a Cash t-shirt and a fedora on his head. _Wonder if he'll bother to ask a question about music. _The kid kept trying to steer the conversation around to Deacon's sobriety or how hot Juliette looked In the outfit she was wearing now. Then the kid asked him, "how performing on tour with Rayna but not being "Rayna James' was."

Deacon pulled down his earphones, "For the record I haven't been Rayna James' boy in twelve years."

Juliette laughed and announced into her microphone, "that he's mine now. And trust me I'm smart enough to know how lucky that makes me."

**The Denver Coliseum **

Deacon watched as Rayna finished her regular set. Her red dress shimmered from the lights and she smiled widely, waving to the crowds as she exited. Deacon watched as Rayna turned towards Liam and blew him a kiss. Her eyes lingered on Liam as he winked back at her. Deacon clinched his jaw and Rayna began to walk off stage.

Deacon knew he should resist the urge but he couldn't help himself. He side stepped and got right into Rayna's path. Rayna frowned as they came face to face but said nothing.

Deacon practically shouted over the roaring crowd, "You know Ray, I think someone needs to remind you that you are a married woman."

He saw the fire in her eyes as she yelled back, "Excuse me?"

Deacon nodded towards Liam who was coming towards them. "I said, every single person in Colorado thought you two were getting ready to starting screwing right there on the stage. "

Deacon waited to feel the sting of her palm against his cheek but instead his own words slapped him in the face. "Well the good news is, it isn't twelve years ago, so I'm not your responsibility anymore. So what other people think of me isn't really your concern anymore."

She turned around and walked towards the back of the stage, presumably heading to her dressing room. Several stagehands began to yell at him, telling him to get on stage now.


	2. Chapter 2

**Las Vegas**

**Above the Airport  
**

The pilot confirmed they were backed up on the ground and the plane would be circling for at least another thirty minutes. Although her back had been turned to Juliette and Deacon, she'd heard their over-the-top flirting for the entire flight. Liam leaned forward in his seat and told her to keep calm. She nodded and then let out a small smile in gratitude.

Rayna handed Liam a piece of paper, words she'd written the night before, half drunk. "I wrote it to the chords we were working last week." Liam read the words several times, his eyes getting wider in some places and his laughter was very telling. _He likes it. _

Liam gave her a long look and asked if she was sure. "There is painfully honest. Then there is this."

Rayna nodded but she assured her she wanted to "do this." She heard Deacon laugh again, the deep laugh he did when he was trying flirt

**Backstage  
**

Rayna marched down the hallway, not bothering to knock before throwing the door open. Deacon was sitting on a chair, guitar in his hand. Juliette asked what the hell was going on, pushing her makeup people away. Rayna didn't bother responding to the blonde woman and instead glared at Deacon, with one hand on each hip.

Deacon put the guitar down and stood up, asking "what do you want Ray?"

Rayna pointed her finger at Deacon, "You keep my name out of your mouth. Do you understand me?"

"Excuse me?" Deacon asked as he took a step closer. Both ignored Juliette's protests as they continued to stare at each other.

"You heard me. Next time some DJ ask anything about me, pretend you have amnesia or didn't hear the question. You do not mention me again. " Rayna turned to leave before throwing out an insincere apology to Juliette for not knocking first.

**Rayna's Hotel Room**

Rayna stumbled into the hotel room, her head swimming in the fog of vodka and wine. She and Liam had bounced from bar to bar and group to group. Her hair stuck to her face as she took in her appearance in the large vanity mirror. Her skin was shiny from sweet and her hair was sticking to her arms and neck.

Earlier tonight one of the bartenders had gushed about how much she loved Rayna's music. The conversation moved to she and Deacon. The girl couldn't help but gush about cute Deacon was and how jealous she'd be of all those woman hanging over her man. Rayna had just politely smiled and asked for a double.

She looked at the clock beside the large bed. It was 4:27 am. It was 4 hours and 27 minutes into the day she hated the most. She peeled the jeans down her legs and plopped on the bed. Aloud she whispered "Happy Birthday to me."

**8 hours later**

Rayna walked out of the shower and felt a little better. Her head hurt less now that she'd taken aspirin and drank plenty of water. Tandy sent her a simple text message as had several of her girlfriends. The girls had called early, practically screaming the Happy Birthday song to her. Teddy wished her a good day and once the girls were out of earshot asked how things were. Rayna had nothing new to say. The conversation was short: Maddie had gotten a B on some science test and Daphne had a sleepover tonight. As she hung up the phone, she felt a sense of relief. _Hopefully he won't call again til tonight. _

Rayna smiled when the bellhop brought up two large vases of flowers: one from her manager and the other from Teddy. Next, the hotel brought up a huge spread of breakfast foods include pancakes with chocolate syrup with a birthday message. Edgehill had sent a simple diamond necklace in the shape of a star with a simple message, "Always our Star. Happy Birthday."

Rayna headed over to her dressed hung in the large closet. She had several interviews today with various television shows and then a few phone interviews with newspaper people in Oregon and Washington, their next two cities. For a brief moment, she let her mind wonder if Deacon would even acknowledge the day. But she scolded herself for even going there.

She picked out a dress, a fire engine red wrap around. _If everybody is going to be looking at me, might as well make it worth the while. _


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for all the comments! They are encouraging :)  
**

**SEATTLE**

Deacon felt his blood pressure rise as he looked at the pictures Juliette had pulled up on her computer. It was Rayna and Liam at some Vegas bar. They were all over each other: in one picture his hand on her thigh, in another she was whispering in his ear with his hand on her back. The story that went along with the pictures detailed the night before. _Instead of attending a pre-planned birthday dinner with her management team, she blew it off without a word. _The article claimed everyone at the party waited for over an hour for their guest of honor to show and that they eventually got word she had other plans.

The article mentioned the election for Mayor and one of the pictures with Teddy and Peggy. The article didn't even mention him at all. He gave the computer back to Juliette before storming out of the hotel room.

**St. Thomas Catholic Church**

Deacon rubbed his bloodied knuckles as he recited the words he knew so well, "Hello, my name is Deacon and I'm an alcoholic." Two of the women there seemed to recognize him as did the leader. The other group members didn't appear to know him from Adam. He told his story quickly then sat down, listening as some olive-skinned woman told the story of the last few months. She'd been sober for 193 days. Her two teenage kids were having trouble believing that she'd stay sober and her ex-husband had yet to give her benefit of the doubt. _Try twelve years of your life._

**KeyArena**

Deacon could hear Rayna's voice booming through the playback as he approached the side stage. He listened to a few songs, growing more and more annoyed. Liam was an awesome player but he hung on too long during the bridge of 'Changing Ground' and Liam played 'Alone Again' with more jazz than country.

He watched as Rayna sang leaning against Liam's back, the now infamous high-kick thing they did was just stupid. _It was rehearsal, why the hell do they need to do a high-kick for sound check? _Then she sang two of her new songs. The song was more rock-and-roll than anything she'd ever done before. It was raw in a way she hadn't been in years. He watched as she smiled at the end of the song, a real smile. One that was directed towards Liam. _One that use to be reserved for him. But like everything else with Ray, he was quickly becoming nothing more than a memory. _

**Rayna's Hotel Suite**

Deacon continued to bang on the oak door, knowing security was probably on their way. Finally he heard Rayna groan his name before the door swung open. She was dressed in an old t-shirt and shorts. Her hair was in disarray and her eyes were red. _She'd been sleeping. _ The hand on her hip was a sign that she was ready to fight. Deacon pushed the door open as Rayna's face went from confusion to anger.

Deacon waited for a minute before angrily asking "what the hell was going on?"

Rayna shock her head in disbelief and in her sarcastic twang answered, "Well it looks like breaking and entering to me."

Deacon huffed for a minute before giving her a warning. "Ray...I am serious."

Deacon listened to her rant and rave about the time and him barging into her hotel room. He felt his voice shake with anger when he told her she "knew damn well" what he was talking about. Silence filled the room before he continued. "Are you sleeping with Liam?"

Rayna shook her head in disbelief, "I don't see how that is any of your busi…."

"Ray I'm serious. Are you sleeping with Liam?" He knew he was holding his breath but couldn't make himself breathe.

Rayna met his gaze for a minute with a question, "Why do you care?

"Why do I care?" Deacon repeated.

"Yes, why do you care?, asked Rayna getting more annoyed. When she realized Deacon was trying to find his words, she continued. "You know you have some nerve."

"Oh do I?"

Rayna spit back, "Yes you do…You attack me every chance you get, you criticize me, you can't wait to tell me how else I've disappointed you or failed you. You pick Juliette else's side over mine every chance you get…and now you're barging in here…."

Deacon cut her off again, "Oh God, this has nothing to do with Juliette."

"Really? Cause the only reason you are on this tour is because of her. In fact, ever since she offered you a job, you've completely changed."

Deacon accused her of being jealous but Rayna denied it. The two went back and forth for a while before Rayna let out a frustrated groan. "Why are you here? To accuse me of cheating on my husband or accuse me of being jealous of the girl who you replaced me with?"

Deacon opened his mouth but Rayna got angrier. "Get out. I don't need this, especially now. " He looked at her surprised for a moment before realizing it was better to go, for now. He slowly walked the distance to the door and was unsurprised to hear Rayna slamming the door behind him.

**9 Hours Later**

**Rayna's Dressing Room**

Deacon sat in the darkened corner near the bathroom, waiting for Rayna to come back after she signed autographs. He wasn't surprised when Liam, followed a second later by Rayna walked into the room. They were so caught up in their conversation, neither looked over in his direction.

Deacon listened as the two went back and forth about Rayna changing labels. "The tracks weren't ready to go out," "Sorry I was just trying to help." Liam occasionally leaned into Ray but she never leaned back.

"If you want to stay in something that's stale, old, and boring, go for it. Maybe that's your thing."

Rayna looked up at him and asked what that meant.

"Think of Edgehill like your marriage, the only way to get through it is by fantasizing about someone else."

He say her tense then strained to hear her say, "Look can we just not bring Deacon into the conversation right now."

Liam responded fine before asking if she wanted to go out tonight.

Rayna admitted she did, "anything to keep from going back to that hotel room alone." Liam nodded, walking out of the dressing room before Deacon cleared his throat.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for all the comments! I seriously can't wait to Wed.'s show!  
**

**Rayna's Dressing Room**

Silence filled the air as Rayna turned a light shade of pink. She wanted to be mad and yell at him for eavesdropping but she couldn't seem to say anything or do anything. She just looked at him and he just stared back at her.

When he spoke he said one syllable, the name he always called her, "Ray."

She felt her eyes fill with tears as she dropped to the couch in the middle of the room. A few seconds later, Deacon went to sit on the coffee table, took her hands in his and asked what was going on. When she didn't respond, he reached out and tucked her hair behind her ear.

She shook her head gently trying to convey she couldn't talk about it right now. She tried to turn her head away but Deacon wouldn't let her. He wiped that was rolling down her cheek as his finger massaged her cheek. Her voice cracked when she asked how they got here.

"Got where? In a dressing room after a concert? Darlin' we've been here a lot over the years."

"You know what I mean."

Deacon tried to lighten the mood, "No I don't. But if it has anything to do with fantasizing about me, I'd be interested in hearing the details."

Instead of making her laugh, it made Rayna cry harder. Deacon moved from the table to the seat beside her on the couch. He let her cry for a few minutes, her head tucked in shoulder. He ran his hand down the spine of her back, making soothing circles as he let her cry.

He whispered a few things to her, none of which she acknowledged. Finally he told her he went to an AA meeting a few blocks from the hotel. "I saw this Chinese place, one of those late night buffet places about two blocks from the hotel." She muttered something and he kissed the top of her head. "You know it could be your birthday dinner."

She extracted herself from Deacon and wiped her face. "I hate my birthday."

He let out a relieved laugh. "You don't hate your birthday, you just hate the date. Remember how you wouldn't let me acknowledge it on the day. Instead we had to wait a few days before you'd even let me take you out or give you your present."

She nodded and wiped her nose with her sleeve. "I just hate I have to share my birthday with Daddy. He would always use my party to wheel and deal or make it about him."

Deacon, "So do we have a date?"

Rayna knew she sounded like a child when she asked, "do they have frozen yogurt from the machine thing too?"

**Hong Kong Restaurant **

**2 hours later**

Rayna laughed hysterically and clapped as the servers finished Happy Birthday. She blew out the candles stuck in the sushi on her plate. Deacon had bought the candles from the drug store across street and a three dollar pink crown with the words "Birthday Princess" scrolled on the front. She'd worn it proudly since he placed it on her head in the middle of the street.

They were only the people in the restaurant, save a few drunken college students in the front room.

"Thank you," she said seriously as he dug into rice.

"For what?"

"Everything….My life is a mess right now and in the last few hours, you've made me actually not miserable."

Deacon smiled and reached his hand out and clasped her on top of the table. "You gonna tell me what's going on?"

She shrugged, taking a sip of diet coke before asking where he wanted to start. He let his smile spread across his face. "So was I any good in these fantasies?"

Rayna chocked on her drink, laughing and turning red. "It was pretty realistic."

Deacon's eyes lit up. "Hmmm. That good, huh?"

She balled up her paper napkin and threw it at him. He picked up his napkin and returned the favor. They both laughed as the continued throwing the papers back and forth.

**The Penthouse Hallway**

Rayna yawned as Deacon walked her to her room. She slipped out of Deacon's jacket and gave it back to him. "Thank you for tonight."

Deacon sheepishly smiled, admitting he'd enjoyed it too.

"But I never actually told you the truth about everything's that been happening."

"Didn't want to push."

Rayna pressed her lips together, getting ready to say something when the elevator dinged loudly. The pair watched as Juliette walked off the elevator and rolled her eyes. "Oh look who it is. The greatest guitar player in Nashville and the one who holds him back." Deacon rolled his eyes while Rayna just put her hands in her pocket.

Juliette asked where they'd been, "afterall you and I need to go over the set changes I talked to you about on the plane."

Rayna quickly excused herself into her room with a goodnight to both of them. Deacon sighed heavily before turning to Juliette and asking "what the hell that was?"

Juliette held up a hand, "That was saving you. You can thank me later."


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all for the amazing comments and follows! **

**Chapter 5**

**Sante Fe**

Ranya felt herself getting more and more irritated as Juliette continued to grind against Deacon on stage. _Just get through Wrong Song and it'll be over. _She could still hear Juliette's words from earlier today and it bothered her more than she was willing to admit.

She heard Liam say, "That's our cue." as she walked back out onto the bright lights for the encore.

**Penthouse 4**

Liam helped himself to the wet bar and propped his feet up on the coffee table. "Look whatever Little Miss Sparkly Pants said it couldn't have really bothered you that much."

Rayna stepped out of her heels and ran reclined on the couch. "Let's see, first she accused me of abandoning Deacon as soon as the going got tough. She reminded me that Deacon was only able to remain sober because he wasn't with me anymore and basically blamed me for becoming an alcoholic. She reviewed how few of Deacon's songs I have recorded. She reminded me of all the opportunities Deacon turned down over the years to be my lead guitarist." Liam whispered "ouch" as he downed another airplane bottle.

"On a happier note, Teddy thinks you and I sleeping together."

Liam laughed, "Well since we're already suspected of doing the crime, might as well do the time." Liam began unbuttoning his shirt until Rayna slapped his hand away.

"I'm serious. He saw the pictures of us in Vegas. He saw us on stage in Nashville."

Liam nodded, "Well he probably can't imagine any woman would be able to resist my charms. Not to mention, your high-kicks are like a Siren's song, a kind of mating call if you will. "

Rayna let out a soft laugh and admitted she was dreading the break next week. "I'll be glad to see the girls but I'm dreading the fights with Teddy."

Liam casually asked if she'd made a decision yet.

"Yeah…I think I have. I actually think I made it a long time ago, I just haven't been able to say it out loud yet."

Liam asked if she needed recommendations for lawyers.

"You don't know what I am going to do."

Liam shrugged as he popped open the bottle of wine and poured Rayna a glass. "Everybody knows what you're going to do."

Liam looked at her for a moment and asked if she wanted to skip barhopping and try to find some studio space.

Rayna shook her head no and apologized. "I just want to be alone tonight. I've got Clay's radio show in the morning and I think I just want to be alone right now." Liam nodded and kissed her cheek before heading out.

**WCPA-Country Today**

Rayna hugged the DJ, telling Clay he was looking good. He returned the compliment and asked how "ole' Lamar was doing now that he'd lost Coleman too?"

She shot a look at him, "You know Daddy, he likes no one more than he loves himself."

Clay asked Rayna if anything was off limits. "Just nothing about Teddy please."

The blonde man laughed a wide smile, "So are the rumors true about you and McGinnis? "

Rayna shot him a warning look but Clay just smiled as he sat in the DJ chair while the countdown began. "Well folks good morning, today I have the pleasure of hosting Country Superstar and the first girl I ever kissed, Miss Rayna James."

**Soundcheck in Sante Fe**

Deacon yelled he needed "five" as he jumped off the stage to greet Clay. The two quickly walked away from the stage and began catching up. Deacon rolled his eyes as Clay began to ask about "their collective ex."

"I'm here for Juliette Barnes."

Clay shook his head, "Deac, this is me. I've known Rayna since we were four. I was there for your first show…if you can call eight people watching a game, a show. I was on tour with you and Rayna for almost three years. I slept on the same bus as y'all and had adjoining rooms most nights. I know way more about you two then I need to. You my friend, here for Rayna Lynn Wyatt."

Deacon wouldn't meet his eye but instead just smiled. "She would kill you if she heard you call her that."

Clay turned serious, "Hey look man. Why don't you come over to my house after the show. It'll give us a chance to check up."

Deacon nodded sure and the guys shook hands.

**Penthouse 2**

Rayna pushed her way through the door when Juliette asked what she wanted.

"You know you have no idea what happened between Deacon and I. I know you think that since you've known Deacon for a hot minute that you know everything. You have no clue about my relationship with Deacon.

Juliette rolled her eyes and told Rayna to leave. But Rayna merely put her hand on her hip. "You really I think I left Deacon the second he became an alcoholic?"

Juliette seemed unnerved but shrugged, "The way I hear it you just left him after he checked himself into rehab."

Rayna nodded, "Did you know that was his fifth time in rehab? Did you know they had to pump his stomach twice the week he left his third stint? Did you hear about the time he drove his car into a ditch and we found him six hours later, passed out in his car. Did he you ever see the bills from my hotel rooms for the maids who cleaned up his vomit in the carpet, not to mention the bill from room service and the hotel bars. "

Juliette swallowed while Rayna continued, "We had two set orders depending on how sober Deacon was. The green set meant Deacon and I could perform together. The Red set meant I did all my solo stuff first while they tried to sober him up backstage."

Rayna' voice shook, "You may think since you've got a criminal record and have a marriage under your belt that you know everything, but you do not have a clue. You never begged some crack-whore in an ally to remember which way Deacon stumbled out of a bar. You've never bribed a cop with front row tickets to keep Deacon out of jail or screamed at him until you were hoarse because you couldn't tell if he was drunk or dead." Silence filled the air before Rayna softly whispered, "I did that every night. I did that every night for three and half years. The man I loved was just…gone and I kept waiting for him to come back."

Juliette bit her lip and tried to apologize but instead Rayna just sat down slowly on the couch. "I know you are his friend and I am really glad he has some support…but you have no idea the we went through."

Juliette wiped a tear away from her cheek, "Actually, it sounds pretty familiar."

The two stood awkwardly for a moment before Juliette asked if what she was doing for the next few hours.

"Well since telling you off took a little less time than I planned…nothing really."

"I was going to try and write for a while. I mean, if you want to stay."

**PH 6**

Rayna walked into the hotel, tired but an excited kind of tired. She really liked the direction she and Juliette's song was going. It was raw and nasty but it was a damn good song. _They'd both joked that Edgehill would throw a fit before letting either one of them was allowed to release it._

She yawned but before she could start to undress she heard a knock at the door. She opened the door, surprised to see Teddy standing on the other side. He politely asked to come inside which she allowed. She listened to ramble on for a few minutes. He had a purpose as he kept talking about the state of their relationship, but didn't appear to be communicating it very well.

Rayna's heart dropped when he quietly told her, "I want our marriage to work. I want you, I love you. But I need to know where you stand on this. I need an answer now: do you want this work?"

Rayna felt her breath catch in her throat and couldn't speak for a moment. Finally she let out a sound somewhere between a cry and a whisper. She forced herself to calm down enough to let out a "No."

Teddy's own breath hitched as she clarified, "I don't….I don't want this anymore."

Rayna felt her begin to sob as Teddy walked out with another word and slammed the hotel door behind him.

**The Hotel Lobby**

Deacon walked into the lobby, feeling better about a lot of things. His night with Clay had given him clarity. After all, Clay had known both he and Ray for years and was one of maybe five people on the face of the planet that Ray let in.

He was so lost in thought that he didn't see Teddy until he practically ran into him. Teddy scuffed a "great" as Deacon muffled Teddy's name in a question.

Deacon didn't say anything as he walked past Teddy but that didn't stop the shorter man from yelling back at him. "You are going to ruin her just like last time. Only I won't be there to pick up what you broke."

Deacon hit the elevator button and quickly jumped in before hitting the PH button.


	6. Chapter 6

**Outside of Austin**

Deacon pressed his head against the window pane as the exits became more crowded with motels and gas stations. They'd be downtown within half an hour. He hadn't seen Rayna in a nine days, not since before his run in with Teddy in the lobby.

That night, he'd gotten into the elevator and hit PH. Then he'd chickened out and gone to see Juliette instead. They'd tried to write for a while but his mind had been elsewhere. The next morning, he'd been informed Rayna had checked out of her hotel in the middle of the night and got the red eye back to Tennessee. He'd flown back with Juliette but had stayed inside most of the time.

He'd figured that Rayna and Teddy had made up until Scarlett called yesterday, asking if he heard the news.

**The Tarrington Hotel **

Rayna jumped out the SUV, happy to see fifty or so fans and unsurprised to see a line of cameras and reporters lined up behind the security guards. She smiled despite her mood and waived to the fans. The flashbulbs of the cameras blinded momentarily as Buck helped her inside.

She was escorted to a private elevator and insisted she could find her room by herself. The last week and half had been hell. They'd told the girls about the divorce and then all hell broke loose. Maddie had told her about his late night phone calls to Peggy. That had been the night before Teddy had the audacity to ask for spousal support. She'd threatened to go to the cops and have both he and Peggy thrown in jail. So Teddy vowed to send her father and sister to jail with them. Then she'd had several heated discussions with her father, one bad fight with Tandy, and an awkward run-in with Coleman at the gas station. She'd met her with her lawyer several times and finally yesterday morning she'd filed for divorce. Liam had driven her and waited outside the courthouse with a bottle of champagne hidden in the center consol.

A few hours later, Bucky released a statement and the whole world was in on her mess of a life.

**Austin Coliseum –Backstage**

Rayna walked out of her dressing room, finding everyone's festive mood a bit too much for her. She was glad to see Deacon, still in his plaid shirt and jeans leaning against the concrete wall, as if he was waiting on her. She walked over towards him, battling several dancers and a rack of costumes to get close enough.

"Hey cowboy," she said quiet enough that nobody else would hear. Deacon's eyes sparkled as he pushed himself off the wall and asked if she'd like a cup of coffee.

Rayna counter offered, "I'd rather have ribs and pecan pie with lots of whip cream."

Deacon let a slow smile spread before motioning for Rayna to lead the way.

**Jake's Hide-a-Way**

Rayna licked her fingers as Deacon grinned, "You know if you lick the plate too, I am moving tables." She drank another swallow of tea before asking Deacon what he wants to know. The place was practically empty and most of the wooden chairs were already stacked up on the tables.

Deacon's eyes narrowed. "What do you want to tell me?"

"I filed for divorce yesterday."

Deacon shook his head, "I heard."

Rayna nodded, guessing between the press and everyone on tour someone had given him a heads up. "Actually no. Teddy told me. I ran into him in the lobby in Sante Fe."

Rayna's face showed she was surprised but she continued."He came there to try and work things out and I told him I wanted a divorce."

Deacon looked down at his own glass of tea, swirling it around like he use to do with his liquor. It was what he did when he wasn't sure what to say. Rayna swallowed hard, ""You were right that day at your house. I'm not happy. I haven't been happy in a long time."

An easy silence filled the table as the waitress refilled their drinks and brought the pie. Once the waitress left she started again. "I think…I think in some weird way Teddy and I were fine as long as I had you too. But then…Juliette came along and I felt like I was..like I am losing you and then I stopped being able to pretend everything else was okay."

Deacon reached his hand out to Rayna, clutching her hand in his. "You are not losing me."

Rayna felt her eyes fill with tears but continued on, "It just feels like you are writing with her and touring with her and I don't know…."

Deacon took a fork with his free hand and stole a piece of Rayna's pie and asked if he'd, "You know there is absolutely no one who can replace you or us." Rayna bit her lip, realizing how serious the conversation was turning. She leaned back in her chair, releasing Deacon's hand as she did.

Deacon asked, "how did the girls take it?"

"Not too good. Maddie begged me to come out on tour. I almost let her."

"How is ol' Lamar taking the news?"

Rayna rolled her eyes, "Daddy is too busy trying to save his investment in the election to worry about me or the girls right now."

"Ray, how are you. Really?"

Rayna gave Deacon a long look before admitting she was, "Relived…Relived and guilty. I mean I am devastated for my babies and I see the way I am hurting Teddy. I just…I couldn't be the type of wife he deserves."

Deacon grimaced, "And exactly what type of wife does Teddy deserve?"

Rayna spent a long minute thinking before letting out the breath she'd been holding. "Teddy deserved the kind of wife….that loves him more than she loves Juliette Barnes's lead guitarist."

Deacon just looked at her for a minute before the waitress ran over, "Sorry Ms. James, there are like five guys outside with cameras. We called the police and, well my boss says y'all can go out the back door but you better hurry before they figure out there is a side exit."

Deacon gave Rayna a look before throwing money on the table and asking if she was ready. Rayna took his hand and got out of the chair as the two headed for the kitchen exit.

**Nashville**

Maddie turned around again as the printer started up. She silently begged it not to make too much noise as the paper came out. She grabbed the pieces of paper, double checking the flight times and the gate number. She had already packed her bookbag: two pair of clothes, the cash she'd taken from her parents safe, her license, her cellphone and charger. She'd hidden her school books in her closet and had already emailed her homeroom teacher, using her mom's email, to let them know she was sick and wouldn't be in school today.

She stuffed her plane ticket in her book bag as she heard her Dad telling Daphne good morning.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7-Thank you all for the amazing responses and feedback!  
**

**Dallas**

**American Airlines Center**

Rayna smiled to herself as she got ready for sound check. Hell, she'd been smiling all day.

After they left Jake's, they said nothing as they walked through the streets of Austin, hand in hand. His thumb drew lazy circles around her wrist as they meandered under streetlights and slowly made their way back to the hotel. They didn't say much, sharing an occasional smile or laugh out of pure happiness. Then, eight blocks from the restaurant, Deacon had finally pulled her close and kissed her. It had been slow and deliberate kiss. Eventually his tongue licked the seam of her lips, begging for entrance into her mouth. She scraped her nails against the nape of his neck causing him to moan into her mouth. When she had to pull away to catch her breath, he gave her a second before kissing her again.

They stayed like this for long minutes until the headlights of some cab had broken them up. They'd made their way back to the hotel but had changed their minds when they'd spotted multiple men with cameras on their side waiting at the front door.

Nobody spotted them down the street as they broke onto Ray's tour bus, something they use to do all the time when they wanted some alone time. She remembered the way his hands had danced on her skin, slowly inching her shirt upwards. She could still feel his breath on her neck and the way he said her name like a deep prayer.

She blushed when she heard Buck calling her name. She quickly ran onto the stage to start but not before Liam gave her a knowing smirk.

**Backstage-San Antonio  
**

Deacon smiled at the crew, not even caring that he nearly got hit in the head with an a mic stand. Normally before a show, he was excited about performance, the stage, the audience's reaction. But tonight he was just ready to be done.

Last night had been incredible. He and Rayna had made love twice on the tour bus, like they use when the entourages and fancy hotels got to be too much. But once the sun began to peek through the blinds on the bus, they had to get back to reality. Buck had packed her suitcases and brought them on the bus. To everyone else, it looked like Rayna had just been early. For his part, he'd used a side entrance to the hotel well after the camera guys left, got his stuff, and jumped on Juliette's bus.

Since then he hadn't seen Ray. She had a bunch of phone interviews for newspapers while they were traveling. They'd exchanged a few texts and a secret smile in the hallway; but now he just wanted to be alone with her again. He needed to make sure last night wasn't some fluke or cruel joke. It didn't feel like the end of something but until she said those words, he would have his doubts.

He grabbed his guitar and headed down the concrete corridor only to stop short when he saw Buck's face. A second later he saw a flash of red hair running towards him. Deacon had just enough time to lay his guitar down before Rayna flew into his arms crying. He tried to pull away several times to figure out why she was so upset but Rayna's grip on him was strong. Bucky came closer over and quickly told him that Maddie had run away. "The last time anyone saw her was 12 hours ago. She never showed up for school today and the police haven't been able to find any trace of her. Teddy just called her and told her."

Deacon felt Rayna's breath hitch against his body as he stroked her hair and told Bucky to let Juliette and Glen know what was going. "Tell Juliette she's going on first. Have Brice take lead guitar for the first set and tell Juliette to do the long set. I'll try and be out for the acoustic set."

**45 Minutes Later**

Rayna's voice cracked, "Thank you Governor for all you are doing." She quickly hung up and took the phone Buck was holding, "Tandy, what about that girl that Maddie use to be in scouts with, Amy? Alice?...maybe Allison? I swear it begins with an A, she had really dark hair. You remember?...Oh okay. Yeah um...okay."

Rayna listened in on the other end, then started to cry all over again. "Just call me the second you hear anything...I love you too." Rayna looked up at the live feed from the stage and told Deacon he "better get out there. She's on like the fifth chorus of 'Boys and Buses'. The buses have already come around again like twelve times."

Deacon put one hand on each of her shoulders and asked if she was sure that she'd be okay. With tears in her eyes, she nodded. "You need to be out there." Without thinking, he leaned in for a quick chaste kiss, one to reassure her. He turned quickly to leave, wanting to hurry up and get done with the next four songs.

**2 Hours Later-Rayna's Dressing Room**

Rayna threw her cell phone on the floor where it landed with a thud. Buck picked it up and told her to stay calm.

"Stay calm? STAY CALM? MY DAUGHTER IS GOD KNOWS WHERE RIGHT NOW…"

Liam handed Rayna a glass of brown liquor which she declined. Deacon thanked Juliette for all her help tonight but said she could go. She nodded, understanding Deacon wanted to talk to Rayna alone.

Juliette softly reassured everyone, "the plane will be ready in another hour. I'm going to go ahead on so we are ready as soon as the Jet is cleared."

Rayna wiped another tear streaming down her face and said a "thank you." Liam and Bucky excused themselves too, saying they would go ahead with Juliette. Deacon looked at Rayna for a moment before asking what she wanted to do. "Ray, in a few hours we'll be back in Nashville. You'll be with Daphne. And then when Maddie shows up, you'll be close by."

She wiped her nose using her sleeve and thanked him.

"For what?"

"For everything."

He took her hand and promised her, "we'll find Maddie and she'll be fine." He knew he shouldn't have made her that promise. AA taught him a long time ago that he shouldn't make promises, shouldn't guarantee things that he couldn't control. But he'd never seen her scared like this before.

**10 AM-NASHVILLE**

**Rayna's House**

Deacon hated this house. It was everything Ray said she never wanted:a Belle Meade Mansion in a gated community. It had a pool and a room made just to do the laundry. It was the complete opposite of the place he and Rayna lived in together: their small and remote cabin. But here he was: in the middle of the living room trying to appear as comfortable as possible.

He looked over at Rayna who was looking at pictures of Maddie on the mantle. He'd never seen Ray look so lost. Even at his most drunk and most desperate, she'd held it together in front of others. So far she'd cussed out Tandy, slapped Teddy, threatened Lamar, and sobbed hysterically in front of half the police department. She had yelled at him when he finally dragged her inside after she screamed Maddie's name in some desperate attempt to find her. She'd only calmed down when Daphne had awoken due to all the yelling.

Then they had the ridiculous press conference. That had been Lamar's idea: Teddy and Rayna present a united front for the cameras. "Maddie went missin' cause of this silly divorce idea. If she thinks you two are back together…well, I'm sure she'll come on home." But the press conference had been two hours ago and carried locally by every station. Yet there was no word from Maddie or anybody else.

He took a cup of coffee from Coleman and sat down, watching Rayna. None of this made sense. Maddie had always been so calm and rationale. During the summer, the girls would go on tour with Rayna. Daphne would start climbing some random ladder or would pick up a conversation with a random crew member. But Maddie never did. She would always tell Rayna where she was going and how long she would be gone.

Now this twelve year old bought a plane ticket, stole money from her parents, and skipped school? Then she never made it to the plane and had been in hiding for almost 24 hours? He groaned when a thought occurred to him and quickly got up.

He wondered through several rooms before finding Coleman and asking if he could have a minute.


	8. Chapter 8

**Rayna's House**

12: 15 pm

Deacon washed the blood of his knuckles and took a moment to breathe. He knew he shouldn't have lost his temper but the second he heard Teddy call Rayna a whore, all rational thought flew out the window.

Coleman had agreed with him: Lamar had something to do with Maddie's disappearance. _It was just way too clean for a child to pull this off. _Maddie had bought a plane ticket on the home computer. _But where the hell does a twelve year old learn how to use a credit card or order plane tickets online. Sure Rayna was always on planes but management always did those things for her. Then add in Maddie's foresight into departures times, taxi services, and then her complete lack of a trail and it didn't make sense. _

_Or in Coleman's word it, "had Lamar's fingerprints all over it." _

He turned off the water and promised himself that no matter what that he was going to be strong for Rayna. She'd been his rock since they met. Now, he was going to be there for her.

3: 07 pm

Deacon tried not to feel jealous as Teddy and Rayna sat on the couch together hugging Maddie. But it felt like a swift kick to the gut. Maddie was found at Lamar's guest house. Maddie believed her parents would bond over her disappearance. _What if Maddie's misguided plan had worked? What if Rayna realized she wanted to try again with Teddy? What if Ray decided she should go back to him__ for the girls' sake_? Deacon turned around, suddenly feeling a need for some air.

6:50 pm-

Deacon held Rayna on the floor of the hallway bathroom. The tears she spilled were tears of relief and he could tell exhaustion was setting in. Maddie had been home for hours now.

Lamar had been taken down to the police station, but charges wouldn't come until the police investigation was completed. Deacon suspected they'd probably never come. Bucky and several executives from Edgehill were in the kitchen figuring out when the tour could resume and were going over the press release again. Teddy had several staff members from his officer in the living room, going over schedules and press releases.

20 minutes ago, Rayna had excused herself and he'd quickly followed. They'd ended up here, the only room where they could get away from prying eyes and curious little girls.

Deacon whispered into her tangled hair, suggesting she go lie down. She knew he was right. It had been two and half days since she slept for any time period. And she'd never been as scared as she was while Maddie was gone...but her mind was still racing. Rayna watched as Deacon dislodged himself for her grip and stood up. He took a washcloth, wetting it with warm water before sitting back down on the floor. He slowly pressed the cloth to Rayna's face before he peppered her face with soft kisses.

She managed a weak "thank you…I know I must look like a complete mess." He didn't say anything for a moment, before meeting her gaze. "Even as a complete mess, you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."

Her eyes filled with tears again as she leaned into a kiss. It was meant to be a simple and chaste thank you. Instead it quickly turned into a deep kiss with her straddling his waist. His hands roamed down the back of her thighs as she moaned into his mouth, deepening the kiss.

Her hands moved to the belt buckle of his jeans. It was then Deacon realized he had to stop. _They were on the floor of the hallway bathroom. In Teddy's house. With a dozen people on the same floor. _

He pulled back and said her name in a whisper, causing her to realize they had to stop. She kept her position but sat back , trying to give both of them distance. Her tears spilled over as she apologized.

Deacon just ran his hands through her and let out a happy smile. "Darlin' you NEVER have to apologize for doing that."

She smiled back at him, leaning down to give him one more quick kiss. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For figuring out where Maddie is...For being here even though I know you hate this house, and Teddy, and you haven't slept at all either, and…"

Deacon cut her off, placing a figure on her lips. "Hey…I'm fine. You're fine. The girls are fine. Let's just focus on that."

**1 Week Later-Nashville**

Rayna felt her jaw clinch as Teddy walked away. They'd gotten into a fight. Another fight. Their second one of the day today. She still couldn't believe Teddy had actually called the Police Commissioner and said the family didn't want Lamar prosecuted for a "deeply personal and family matter."

She checked her phone, disappointed that Deacon hadn't texted her yet. _He should have landed over an hour ago. _She hated this feeling.

_Deacon has never been on the road without me and vise versa. Now that he was out on the road and she was in Nashville, they were on completely different schedules. He was on stage after she put the girls to bed. She and Liam were at the Studio by the time Deacon finished all the after-show hoopla. He had sound-check while she was meeting with her lawyers. She had free time when he was on a plane. He was trying to call her when she was comforting Daphne. It had been crazy._

She missed him. She missed him and she'd just gotten him back: Back from the Rebel Kings. Back from Juliette. Back in every since of the word…. and now he was Juliette's again. She knew it was ridiculous, _I'm being ridiculous. _

Next week, she'd be back on tour. The girls, who'd be on Spring Break then, would be coming too. That part made her nervous. Deacon and the girls knew each other. He'd always been 'Uncle Deacon' to them but he'd never been 'hey I am screwing your mama' Deacon. They hadn't even talked about sleeping arrangements. She plopped down on the couch and leaned her head back against the cushion.

_My father practically kidnaps my daughter and nobody cares. My husband is sleeping with his ex. I'm with my ex, who is currently on tour with his ex. The press is fascinated with her relationship with Liam. Tandy's a basket case, trying to defend Daddy while not being able to justify anything he'd done. She had decisions to make about Scarlett and Gunnar's careers to make. And all she wanted feel Deacon's arms around her. _

She grabbed her phone and texted a simple message, "Miss you."

A few seconds later her phone dinged, "You have no idea."


	9. Chapter 9

**Madison, WI**

**Rayna's Dressing Room**

Rayna leaned into Deacon's arms, wrapping her arms around her as his hands wondered around her waist. She whispered "hey" before he smiled against her neck.

His hands ventured lowered to rest on her ass, pulling her closer. She took his cue and let her arms run up his shoulders. He leaned in close against her lips, whispering "hi" before letting his lips slide over hers.

Deacon asked where the girls were against her lips.

"With Sarah backstage. They wanted to see the show." Deacon smirked against her lips and went back to kissing her. Rayna sighed against him as one hand tussled in her hair and the other began playing with the button of her jeans. Rayna pulled back and looked down at Deacon's hands. She wiped his mouth, trying to get hersmeared lipstick off of him.

"Buck is waiting outside and my hairdresser will be here in any minute now. Hell, you go on stage in like fifteen."

Deacon cocked an eyebrow, giving her a sexy smile. "As much as I have missed you, fifteen minutes could probably be arranged."

Rayna gave a relaxed giggle, "How romantic."

He gave her another quick kiss before excusing himself and throwing open the door. Rayna watched him walk away, cocking her head to the side, admiring the view.

**The Dairy-O**

**12: 15 am**

Rayna tried to steal a spoonful of Deacon's plain chocolate to mix with her own, but Deacon clanked his spoon on hers. "You keep your spoon to your own bowl."

Daphne added a "yeah. That mint ice cream she eats is yucky."

Deacon cut the little girl a look and nodded, "way yucky."

Rayna reached over to tuck Daphne's blonde hair behind her ears, "Honey how are you not falling asleep?"

Danphne shrugged, "Adrenaline."

Rayna's eyes got big and Deacon just let out a bark of laughter. Daphne asked if she could go play a video game with Maddie. Rayna dug into her purse and gave her a couple of quarters. "One more game, and then we are going back across the street to the hotel and you are going to bed."

Daphne ran off to the far end of the restaurant as Rayna shifted her chair closer to Deacon. Instinctively, he put his arm around the back of her chair.

He added what was wrong with Maddie and Rayna shrugged. "She's been moody since last night. I don't get it. She wanted to come on tour. She seemed so excited about it. Now that she is here, she just pouts."

"Do you think it's me? Like she knows we are back together?"

"No. I mean I don't think so. She's almost a teenager now. You know how they are."

"I hope for your sake that she isn't like you as a teenager."

She knocked him in the knee with her fist. "Excuse you. You met me when I was 19. You hardly knew me during my teenage years."

Deacon cocked an eyebrow. "Yeah well you and I were together in those last six months of your teens. You were pretty damn wild then. Of course most of your twenties weren't exactly tame."

Rayna blushed as the girls began walking toward the table. "Hey babies. Okay it's time to get y'all to bed."

**10:15 AM**

Rayna waved goodbye to both girls and told to have fun. "Do whatever Sarah tells you to do."

She closed the door and ran back to the bathroom. She sprayed her perfume, put her lipstick on, and fluffed her hair. She and Deacon had agreed he'd keep his separate room and there would be no overnight stays while she had the girls on tour; but they'd figure out a way for some time during the day.

She scolded herself, 'Rayna quit acting like a horny teenager.' _But it has been well over a week. And she'd just gotten him back. And before she and Deacon had gotten back together, she hasn't had sex in months. And it was Deacon. And it'd been over week. _

She grabbed her key card and cell phone and headed to the front door. She saw her cell phone buzz and smiled when she saw it was Deacon. She headed into the hallway, answering with "I'm getting the elevator now."

He didn't respond for a minute causing Rayna to stand up straight. She knew his silence was not a good thing. "Please tell me you are in your hotel room. Preferably naked."

Deacon let out a sigh, "Its Juliette's mom. She's relapsed last night and she is weighing her options."

Rayna let out a frustrated groan. "And let me guess, you can't leave her…"

"You know I can't. She's been sleeping it off but she's awake now and I've been there before so I know she needs someone. Rayna signed deeply. _I've been there before too. _

"Okay, just call me when you can. And Deacon, just…just take care of yourself too okay."

"K. I'll call ya."

Rayna bit her lip hard and picked up her phone, quickly calling Sarah to see how far she and the girls had walked.

**On Stage**

"Thank you so much Wisconsin! Y'all are awesome." As Liam strummed the first few cords of the next song she smiled. _It was one of the new songs they'd written, back when she and Teddy were still together. _

She could how nervous Bucky was on the side as she sang the first line,

"_I can't even think of one good reason, Why I'm always thinkin 'bout leaving." _

After she began the second verse, she looked over to smirk at Liam.

"_Sometimes I wish you cheated on me, then leavin' here would be so easy." _

Rayna could sense the crowd was with her, swaying and nodding to the music. As she sang the last chorus, she could feel the crowd began to sing along and cheer. She smiled brightly. _God, I missed this feeling. _

**Juliette's Dressing Room**

Deacon clinched his jaw as he watched the live feed of the show. _What in the hell is this? _Ray had sung three new songs. All of them clearly had Liam's influence. The songs were good, but a little more risqué than what she normally did. But that didn't bother him so much as much as everything else.

Liam was all over Ray. The stupid ass high-kicks were annoying. Liam getting on the floor playing at Rayna's feet was aggravating as hell as where the back-to-back shit. But when he leaned in to kiss her check at the end of the last song, Deacon had to count backwards in his head.

Juliette interrupted his thoughts. "I said…can you stay with me tonight?"

Deacon turned his attention away from the monitor, "What?"

Juliette smiled shyly. "Look I know you aren't having sleepovers with the great-Rayna James while her kids are on tour. Mama and I got into another fight after sound check and I just want someone else there to keep things calm." Deacon looked at her for a moment before she continued.

"Please…look I have three guest rooms and it would mean so much to me."

Deacon swallowed. _Rayna is going to kill me. "_Sure."

"And maybe we can write some more. You've been kinda distracted lately."

Deacon's thoughts were interrupted by the Stage hand telling them they had "five" before Wrong Song would start.

**The Next Morning-10 AM**

Deacon walked into the hotel lobby exhausted and irritated. First Rayna had about fifty people in her dressing room after the show, all wanting interviews and scoops on the new songs. _Her new songs with the brilliant Liam. _ He hadn't got to talk to her at all and then Juliette wanted to leave almost immediately to go check on her mom. So he'd left.

The fighting between Juliette and Jolene had started the second they'd walked through the door. That led to doors slamming and crying on both sides. Then while he was comforting Jolene, she'd tried to kiss him. He tried to turn her down gently but obviously he hadn't been too clear, 'cause around 2:00 he awoke to Jolene in his bed . After kicking her out of bed and locking the door, he'd realized his cell phone had been on silent.

There were multiple texts from Rayna, most were worried about him. But the last two said the girls were asleep and the babysitter was going to stay with them for a few hours.

Then this morning happened. Originally he was going to ride jump on Rayna's tour bus for the drive today in order to spend time with her. But another fight between Juliette and Jolene had made them all late. Rayna's bus left an hour ago and now he was stuck for four hours still not seeing Rayna.

**Rayna's Tour Bus**

Rayna looked down at her phone again, wondering where in the hell Deacon was. _He didn't see me after the show. Just sent one text saying he'd see me later. _Then after everything fell into place with the girls going to bed early and the babysitter being able to stay…he hadn't even responded back. She'd even gone down to his room only to find nobody there.

Bucky came from the back of the bus, with a look on his face that Rayna knew meant trouble.

"What is it?"

"The ABC affiliate out of Nashville just aired a promo for their lead-in story tonight."

"About?" Rayna asked. Bucky took Rayna's hand and led her down the aisle of the bus towards the back.

"Peggy's husband or ex-husband did a sit-down. He says that Teddy and Peggy have been having an affair for months. He also says that Teddy and Peggy stole money from that real estate deal that went belly up."

Rayna bit her lip and Bucky's eyes got wide. "You knew?"

"About the money, yes. The affair, I just had my suspicions on that one. It was one of the reasons Teddy and I started having problems."

Rayna looked back towards the couches at the front of the bus, wishing she could stop another set of problems from piling up on her daughters. Bucky interrupted her thoughts. "Rayna there is one more thing."

"The guy also insinuates you and Deacon have been having a long term affair. According to Bess, he used the phrase, 'they never stopped'."

Rayna rolled her eyes again. "Well this day keeps getting better and better." She felt her phone vibrate and looked down. "Oh right on time. Teddy."

**Juliette's Bus**

Deacon heard his phone ring and hoped it was Rayna, only to be slightly disappointed it was Coleman. He picked up the phone and listened as Coleman described a news story that was supposedly airing tonight about Teddy and the mistress.

"Deacon just a heads up. They insinuate that you and Rayna have been having an affair this whole time."

Deacon rolled his eyes, "Yeah whatever."

"Deacon I just got off the phone with a reporter from one the papers. They are getting really carried away. He said he had an unnamed source who claimed you were the father to both of her daughters."

Deacon scoffed, "Seriously. That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

Coleman agreed. "Look, I know you are headed to Chicago now. Be careful. You and Rayna both. The media smells blood in the water and if they find out you two are back together…."

Deacon sighed, "Yeah I know. It's gonna look like all the bullshit is true too."


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you so much for the wonderful comments. This show hiatus sucks but writing is helping. **

Chapter 10

Deacon pushed his way inside the hotel, trying to avoid the fans and the paparazzi. He thanked Glenn for the key as he took the white card from him, looking at the number. The traffic had been awful, putting them nearly an hour behind schedule. Ray had texted him, letting him know she and had left for lunch and had stuff to take care of. "See you backstage tonight."

He had just enough time to throw his stuff down in the room and get a nap before soundcheck. He put the card in the lock and laid his guitar down, not even caring enough to flip on the lights. He emptied his pockets of his wallet and cell phone and caught sight of the bed in the mirror.

He let on a confused smile as he saw Rayna laying on his bed, propped up on her elbows. He turned around and gave her the once over. She was wearing her old red boots, the kind that cost more than his mortgage. His eyes trailed up her bare legs until it reached her blue jean skirt. It was short, really short and the way she was laying caused it to ride up more. He scanned upwards, taking a few seconds to appreciate her red tank top which was cleaning to her breasts.

"Hey," she whispered with a grin.

Deacon walked over to the bed, carefully placing one knee between her legs and crawling up her body. He led a trial of quick kisses up her bare leg, then down the other one. She gasped when he moved further, his hands moving her skirt further up. He lifted his head up in a smirk when he realized there was nothing underneath.

Rayna groaned as his hands pushed up her shirt, taking care to kiss her stomach before letting his tounge explore her belly button. He kissed his way up her body, licking the cotton material of her shirt, before explore the topping of breast and making a long path up her neck.

He leaned a "hi" before kissing her deeply. She sighed against him as she hooked a leg over his waist bringing his lower body to press against hers. Between throwing his shirt off and lifting up her skirt he got the general idea. "_Babysitter." "2 hours." "Pants off." "Shut up." _

**90 Minutes Later**

Rayna walked out of the bathroom, wrapping the towel around her while Deacon slung another white towel around his waist.

"So a deals a deal, right?" asked Deacon playfully wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling at the folded terrycloth.

"Fine no more kisses from Liam no matter how innocent they are and I'll limit the kicks. But so help me if that woman ever tries to get in your bed again, I'll rip out every root of her fake blonde hair."

Deacon pulled her to him and kissed her passionately. "I like you jealous."

"I'm not jealous. I'm just trying to avoid being arrested for assault. But newsflash, you are way more jealous of Liam than I am of Jolene. I mean…what is that name?"

Deacon laced his fingers through hers. "You never did tell me how you managed to get into my room. That is a breach of security."

Rayna smirked, "A girl has to have her secrets."

"Betcha I could make you tell." He tugged at the material again causing Rayna to grab her towel and run away. She squealed as she ran around the room with Deacon quickly catching up to her. "Okay okay I'll tell but in twenty minutes I have to sneak out in a laundry cart."

**Juliette's Backstage**

Deacon asked how Juliette was doing and she just shrugged. "Mama called her sponsor but then Glen caught her at the bar ordering a drink."

He gave her a sad look. "It really is one day at a time."

The blonde wiped a tear away and asked why he finally got sober. "I know you said you got sober for Rayna but why then?"

Deacon leaned against the wall, really not wanting to bring up this topic now. "My fourth rehab treatment, I made it all the way to graduation. 90 days clean and sober. Rayna and Coleman were at my little ceremony….God they were so proud of me. But I knew, I knew it wouldn't last."

"How long did it last?"

"Eleven weeks, two days. Ray found me in a bar near Leiper's Fork. I thought she was going to yell at me or cuss me out but she didn't. She just told me to get in the car and drove back home in silence. She put me to bed and figured I'd passed out. Instead I sobered up listening to her sob in the bathroom for hours."

"That must have been hard for you."

Deacon put his hands in his back pocket. "Me? No…I was feeling very little pain. But that was the night I realized she was leaving me. It took her a while to finally do it but then she did. And no matter how much I begged her to come back or how much she wanted to come back, she didn't. And I knew the only way to get her back was to get sober."

Juliette softly smiled. "Well you got her back now. That has to mean something."

Deacon rubbed the scruff on his face. _He hated thinking about that time in his life. As part of his recovery, he never wanted to forget how far down he'd gotten. But damn it was hard realizing that a few months later she'd move out. It took over thirteen years for him to get her back. The thought alone made him sick._

**Rayna's Room Backstage**

Rayna sat down on the arm of the couch. "How bad was the interview?" she asked Buck feeling herself tense up.

He took a sip of his own drink. "I haven't seen it. I just got an email with the low-lights of the first two segments. The rest is airing now. Kenter spent most of the first part explaining how Teddy and Peggy embezzled money and basically called Teddy dumb and a crook."

"How detailed are we talking?"

Bucky shrugged, "According to the email, Paul had bank account numbers and specific days. Reporters have been calling and emailing me all day. But the good news is, even Paul Kenter is saying you had no idea what was going on."

She let out a self-deprecating laugh. "So Rayna James is just clueless and stupid but she's not a crook."

Liam walked into the room, "Don't forget, she also looks pretty damn good in that dress."

Rayna shot him a look of warning. "I told you earlier…."

Liam interrupted, "Hey you said I can't try to feel you up on stage. But seriously, if we can't even flirt in the dressing room, what do we have left?"

**Rayna's Penthouse**

Rayna fell back on her bed with the phone to her ear. "I don't know, my lawyers say that I can't testify against Teddy because we were married at the time and the only way I even know it happened was because he told me…"

Deacon asked how the kids were handling it.

"I love that you ask about them. But I haven't told them anything yet. I figured we'd wait until the morning and try to explain it to them then."

"We?"

"Yeah, I was getting to that. Teddy is flying here in the morning." There was silence on the other end for a minute. Rayna sighed, "Look I'm not thrilled about this either. But Teddy is insisting."

"and let me guess where he'll be sleeping."

Rayna sighed, "The girls are doubling up tomorrow or Daphne will sleep with me and Teddy will get her room."

Deacon let a groan. "Okay so will I still see you lovely ladies for breakfast tomorrow?"

"Yep. Maddie is actually excited it." Silence hung in the air for a second before she whispered "I love you."

Deacon smiled against his cell phone, "I love you. Night."

"Night."

**Nashville **

Coleman hung up the phone and looked out his window, finding the moon high in the sky. Several journalists had called him for a comment after Paul Kenter's interview aired. Most of them called because he'd been a former mayoral candidate, losing to Teddy. He'd been the one who brought the affair to light in the first place.

But the last phone call was different, from the same guy from this morning. That journalist hadn't cared that he was beaten by Teddy Conrad. Instead he wanted to know about his relationship with Rayna and Deacon. This time he only asked about the paternity of the "oldest girl."

Normally, Coleman would have just ignored it but the journalist used a name this time: Mike Lawson. He hadn't heard that name in years and he had to reach into the cobwebs of his mind to remember how he knew the guy. Then it had hit him; he'd been Deacon's roommate in his last stint in rehab.

_The truth was, he's always had his suspicions about what happened back then, but didn't know anything for sure. _

He wanted to wait until the morning to call but knew he couldn't. He let the phone ring a few times before a sleepy voice answer.

"Rayna, I'm sorry this can't wait."


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you for the comments and continued support!**

**Chapter 11**

**Rayna's Penthouse**

Her heart beat faster the longer Coleman kept hinting and beating around the bush.

"Look Rayna. This kid, the Lawson fellow, called me when Deacon was in rehab the last time. Said he'd called you hours before about Deacon taking off. He hadn't heard back from you. So I was the only other person Deacon mentioned to him. Got my number from the phone book in the office."

"Coleman whatever you think…."

"Rayna I went up there. I went to the bars within a few miles. They recognized you, told me you'd picked Deacon up. I drove back to Nashville, the long way. Thought you two might be at the Cabin, letting him sober up..."

"You went to the cabin that night?" Rayna asked, her words barely coming out.

"Briefly, I went up on the porch…I realized I'd walked in on something and figured I'd just call in the morning."

She gasped an "oh my God" before telling Coleman she had to go.

Her mind went blank as she threw down the phone.

**The Hotel Restaurant**

Deacon looked as Rayna played with her breakfast. _Something was off with her. Perhaps she was bracing for seeing Teddy_. _Even during the years Teddy and Rayna were supposedly happy, Teddy being on the road was awkward. Maybe he'd made a place for himself everywhere else in Ray's life but never on tour. But just like the Bluebird, the bridge over Black River, and the cabin…the road was their place. _

The girls continued to chat about Juliette's new outfit from last night's concert. He moved his hand under the table and took Rayna's hand. His thumb drew reassuring circles on her wrist. She met his gaze with an appreciative smile.

**Rayna's Penthouse**

Deacon followed Rayna through the penthouse until she came to stop in the kitchen. She pushed herself up on the counter top and gave him a look of dread.

"How bad?" asked Deacon.

"I don't even know where to start." She paused for a moment, stealing the water back. "The warrants are going to be taken out late Thursday night. Teddy is suppose to turn himself in on Friday before the sun comes up. His bond is going to be set at one million dollars. Daddy is covering it."

"How did the girls take it?"

Rayna shrugged, "We didn't tell Daphne. Sarah took her to lunch and the park. We told Maddie and she is furious at both of us. Somehow this is my fault too. Her father embezzles money with his ex-girlfriend and that is somehow on me."

Deacon asked if anything else was wrong and she took a deep breath.

"Coleman called me last night. Matt Lawson is talking to the papers…or at least a paper."

Deacon furrowed his brow in confusion for a moment before asking what his former roommate was saying.

"I don't know, not exactly."

Deacon let on a soft smile, "What are you afraid he is going to say? He was my roommate when I got sober. That is a good thing."

Rayna's face turned serious. "I just…." Rayna shook her head in silence. "A lot happened back then and it just hard to think about it all and…"

Deacon moved closer, settling between her legs which were swinging off the counter. He looked into her eyes and wiped a tear that had slipped down her cheek. "I know I put you through hell back then. I can never make up for everything I put you through."

She didn't say a word, instead just pulled him closer into a hug. After a long minute she whispered, "You know I love you."

Deacon pulled back to look at Rayna's face. His fingers ran through her hair, and asked if anything else was going on. Instead of answering, Rayna pulled him tightly against her again.

**Backstage in Juliette's Dressing Room**

Deacon walked in suspiciously, it was odd that thirty minutes before show time Juliette had cleared her dressing room to talk to him. He waited for her to finish, only to roll his eyes when Juliette announced a new article was being written about him from an old roommate in rehab.

"Yeah I know. Matt Lawson…"

Juliette nodded and handed her I-Pad to him. Deacon scanned the article. Then read the column again. "Well this is bullshit."

"Which part."

"For one, I wasn't with Rayna when I was in rehab. She'd moved out way before that. Hell, she'd already gotten involved with Teddy. I didn't realize they were serious, hell I thought she was doing it to make me jealous."

"Obviously they were a lot more serious than you thought."

Deacon let out a self-deprecating laugh. "I went to see Ray and told her I was ready to get clean. I'd said the same thing probably a hundred times before. You gotta remember by that point, I gotten kicked out of rehab once, left on my own twice, and relapsed after finally get through it."

"She didn't believe you?"

Deacon shrugged, "She wanted to." A moment of silence past . "She was staying with her sister. I slept on her couch that night and Rayna and Tandy drove me two hours up to the center the next morning."

"So the part about her coming and visiting you in rehab is just a lie?"

"Ray dropped me off and six months later she was announcing her engagement to Theodore."

Juliette looked at Deacon strangely. "It's just a weird thing to lie about."

Deacon rolled his eyes. "Not really. The whole damn article is about how me and Ray have never stopped screwing each other. This lie is just to try and prove that."

**Rayna's Penthouse**

Rayna put her hand on her hip and threw the printed out article on the table. "I have to tell him. Matt Lawson has just told the world that I saw Deacon while he was in rehab."

Teddy shook his head with a very loud "No. We are not having this discussion."

"Ted…"

"I SAID NO DAMN IT. SHE IS MY DAUGHTER."

Rayna clinched her jaw. "He is never going to forgive me for this. But he deserves to know."

Teddy practically spit out his words. "So he didn't deserve to know then but now that you two are screwing again he does?"

Teddy told Rayna to "not even think about." Then he stormed off cussing yelling he was taking the girls out to eat and she needed to stay the "hell away from him right now." She winced hearing the door slam behind him.

Rayna slowly walked to the couch and sat down on the couch.

**Nashville **

Tandy closed the door behind Coleman and shut her eyes. She walked over to her mantle, tracing her fingers over a picture of she and her sister on Rayna's wedding day. She closed her eyes remembering that day fondly. She moved on to look at pictures of she and Rayna as girls and the girl's school pictures.

_All of that was going to be blown to hell now. _Coleman met with the journalist who'd interviewed Matt Lawson and got an advanced copy of a more in-depth article that was coming out tomorrow.

_Lawson recalls Deacon and he had both been granted phone privileges. Lawson chose to call his mother in Virgina; meanwhile Deacon called his long term girlfriend Rayna James. But according to Lawson, Deacon never spoke to Rayna that night. Rather, Clayborne spoke to her roommate. The roommate informed Deacon that Rayna was with her new boyfriend, Teddy Conrad.  
_

Tandy recalled the phone call in her own head. "Deacon she's moved on. His name is Teddy and they are crazy about each other. He is solid and put together. If you really cared about her…like I know you do, you would just let her go." He'd fussed with for a while so she'd reminded him of all his failures and over-exaggerated how close Rayna was with Teddy.

Tandy couldn't make herself read the rest of the article again. She didn't need to re-read it. It was simple: Deacon left rehab, got drunk, and Rayna had found him. The last portion of the article was just speculation on Lawson's part. There was a picture of Rayna and Deacon at the CMAs several years ago and one of them on stage from at least 8 or 9 years ago. The caption read, "Many, including Lawson, believed the two never stopped their relationship."

Tandy put down the paper and then up at the mantle to Maddie's most recent picture.


	12. Chapter 12

**This is a long chapter but I think it was necessary for the story. Thank you all for you continued comments and support. **

**Chapter 12**

3 days later

Deacon looked at Rayna, noticing how beautiful she was looking out the window. He was still surprised she wanted to come back to Nashville for the 2 day break. _Even when the girls were younger, she rarely went home on those two or three day breaks. That was when they worked on fixing problems with the show, when she worked on new material, did interviews and promos for radio shows and photo shoots for magazines. Plus it allowed her to rest her vocal cords._ The pilot came over the small cabin, announcing they were preparing for landing.

He asked if she was okay, after all she'd been acting really weird since Teddy came to visit them on the road.

"Ray. Seriously. Even right now you're almost in tears." She tried to say something but he kept talking. "Look, we jumped into things pretty fast. I mean not counting the 12 plus years. If this is too much for you…"

Rayna shushed him by putting her finger against his lips. She looked at him and smiled when he gently kissed the pad of her finger.

"I love you. I want to be with you. I love being with you."

Deacon waited for her to finish. He could see the tears in her eyes and heard her voice crack. "I wanted to…I wanted to come to Nashville so we could go to the cabin. I want to …I have to talk to you about something. Just you and me."

Deacon let out a breath he'd been holding. _That was not what I was expecting at all. _"The cabin? You want us to go to the cabin?"

She nodded. He let out a smile, "Okay then. I think I can do that."

**2 Hours Later**

Rayna walked up the stairs, the wood giving a little due to age and weather. Her hands traced their way over the wooden rails as mind raced with a million different memories and a thousand different ways she could break this to him.

She hadn't been here since the night before she married Teddy. And before that, since the night Maddie had been conceived. She felt a since of déjà vu as she walked into the porch. The bigger swing hanging on the side had replaced the old one but the two rocking chairs were the same. The fishing poles were cramped over in the corner, like always. The same dead turkey that Deacon had shot fifteen years ago still was hanging from the ceiling. _I always hated that thing. But we compromised, no dead fish but he got to keep the dead turkey. _

The A-frame cabin still held the leather furniture it did twenty years ago. The rock fireplace still centered the living room. The kitchen was still small but had clearly had some updating. The downstairs bedroom had new comforters and was set up was completely different than the way it use to look. She casually walked up the stairs, smiling as she saw the walls were covered with his golden and platinum records. The steps were narrower than she remembered. The bedroom to the left was a clutter of guitars and boxes.

She stopped when she turned to the right. The view over the hill was still breathtaking, even though winter was still lingering in the mountains. She got lost for a moment in a haze of old memories. She heard Deacon coming up the stairs and felt him press his body against hers, wrapping his hands around her waist. He kissed her neck and gave her a husky chuckle.

"What?" she asked, feeling Deacon's erection against her backside.

"If I knew the reason you ran into the house so quickly was to get up to the bedroom, I would've left the bags in the car til later."

She smiled despite her worries and turned around. "You know I love you."

Deacon looked at her oddly, sensing something was going on. Instead of continuing her thought, she pressed her lower body against his. She began un-buttoning his shirt, desperate to hang onto him as long as possible.

**6 hours later**

Deacon walked back into the house with a grin on his face. He and Ray had made love upstairs, then downstairs in the swing. "Just to try out the new one and compare it to the old one."

Afterwards he'd realized they needed food for the night and driven down to the local grocery store to grab a few things to make it until tomorrow. He yelled Rayna's name twice before realizing she was sitting in one of the leather chairs, staring into the fireplace.

He pulled up the coffee table and looked at her, wondering what was going on.

"Ray, are you okay? You've been doing this a lot lately. Just staring at nothing."

She looked at his face for a minute, realizing it was time to just do this. "I want you know before I start that…I love you. I have loved you since I was nineteen. You walked through that side door and changed my life completely." He took her hand glided his fingers through hers. "And since then, I've always been two things: the girl who wants to sing music and the girl who is completely in love with you."

She could tell that she was unsettling him. So she breathed deeply and started at the beginning. "Deacon, do you remember when the last time I was here?"

Deacon thought for a minute then nodded, "Sure. It was right after you moved out. I called you at Tandy's house. You came up here and we got in that big fight."

Rayna nodded, "You were sober when you called but you were drunk by the time I got up here." They both took a moment of quiet remembering the screaming she did and the way he'd begged her to move back. Every time he'd beg her to come back, she begged him to stop drinking.

She broke through the quiet. "Actually I've been here since then, twice. The last time was after the rehearsal dinner, the night before my wedding." Deacon swallowed. He was clearly surprised by that. "I told myself if you were here, I would leave. But you weren't. So I sat on the porch for hours and tried to wrap my mind around everything." She felt her eyes fill with tears, remembering that night. "And then the time before that…was the night you left rehab."

Deacon's face showed confusion for a moment, clearly not understanding what she meant. She gave him a moment, allowing him to catch up.

"I never told you I left rehab. Only Coleman knew about that."

Rayna let out a sound somewhere before a laugh and a sob. "You did tell me. You called Tandy earlier that night and she told you…that I was seeing Teddy." He narrowed his eyes, not understanding what was going on. But his face showed that he did at least recall that part.

"I got back from my date with Teddy, if you can even call it that. Tandy was upstairs you called me from some dive bar like five miles from the center. It had some Irish name and they had those really ugly gingham tablecloths but in green. The whole restaurant looked like a giant picnic blanket. It was late by the time I got there but the bar was pretty full."

Deacon's eyes showed some sort of acknowledgement that he remembered that part. He waited for her to start back and once she gathered her thoughts she did.

"You were so drunk when I got there. You were drinking tequila and you know how you were when you were drinking like that."

Deacon didn't make a sound. Rayna could tell he was trying to conjure up memories of her from that night, memories of her from that night. _Those memories weren't going to come, they never did when he blacked out. _She continued, "There was some bachelor party going on, and they helped you to the car. I paid your bill. Luckily for my credit card you'd started out with cheap vodka." She got lost in her own memory for a second before continuing. "I didn't even notice you had a half a bottle of tequila with you until we were about ten miles down the road."

Deacon's eyes scrunched together. "I knew taking you back to rehab would be pointless. You were still drinking and they'd never let you back in like that. So you and I drove back to Nashville at midnight. We made good time. You passed at one point but woke up before I brought you here."

Deacon looked surprised, "You brought me here? I mean I woke up here but I thought…I just figured Coleman brought me here. When I woke up in the next day, Coleman was here making coffee."

Deacon asked why she never said anything.

She let out a slow breath. "I don't even know how to answer that question." The moments passed in silence as Rayna pulled an old sweat-shirt of Deacon's over her. "That night, you were so drunk. 'member how you use to obsess about things when you drank too much. You'd get stuck on something and not be able to let it go."

Deacon nodded, "Like when we'd write a chorus to a song and I'd just keep singing for hours and dissecting it for hours, constantly talking about it."

"Mhmmm"

"…or when you'd wear some sexy dress and I wouldn't be able to talk about all those things that dress made me want to do to you."

Rayna cracked a smile, "Yeah like that. But you couldn't quit talking about Teddy or me and Teddy. Or how you hated him and how I loved you, only you." She sat Deacon's jaw tighten. _He wants to say something but he doesn't want to interrupt. _

"You kept talking to me about Teddy and asking me questions about him. How many dates we went on, or what we talked about, or where I met him, or how much Daddy liked him." He heart beat faster, surprised Deacon still wasn't saying anything. _He has to know at this point…he has to._

"I went to the kitchen to call Tandy and explain where I was. You found some old bottle of whiskey in one of your hiding places. You started asking me if Teddy made me feel like you made me feel."

Deacon swallowed hard, his face portraying calmness when she knew he wasn't anything but. "I um….I told you that I hadn't slept with him yet. I…um…you…took it as an invitation. You started asking me if he was as good of a kisser as you. If Teddy made me feel like you did."

Deacon softly admitted that "sounded like me. I was cocky as hell when I'd been drinking." He still held her hand in his, trying to comfort her in any small way.

Rayna smiled despite her mood, "You were cocky as hell back then, period. And then you kissed me. You were drunk and upset and I was never good at resisting you and it had been months since we'd been together."

Deacon let out a soft sigh, "That was one of my favorite qualities about you."

Silence clung in the air again, Rayna not sure anything else needed to be spoken. But a moment later Deacon asked for confirmation.

"So…we had sex that night?"

"Yeah, twice actually. I think you were trying to tell me in your own way tell me not to move on with Teddy. You were trying to show me that we belonged together in spite of everything. I was trying to hold onto you for a little longer."

He lifted an eyebrow. She knew his first question.

"Once on the couch and then once upstairs." _He is trying to remember anything about that night. _

"To be honest, any other man wouldn't have been able to …um….perform but I don't know if the alcohol hadn't hit you fully yet or…" She caught Deacon's smile. _Seriously, he is going to be proud of this? _"Anyways you eventually passed out on the bed, sideways and um…I came downstairs and just sat here."

She wiped a tear away and looked at him waiting for him to yell at her but instead he gave her a sad look. "Ray, I am so sorry."

"Sorry?"

"That I don't remember that. I never wanted that for you, for us. And I know that wasn't the only time I was..drunk when we….." Rayna let out a sob, crying for a minute and allowing Deacon to hold her. She felt his words against her ear, holding onto them and the feel of skin against hers. _He doesn't understand, not yet. _Selfishly she allowed herself another moment with him, even daring to kiss him gently before pulling back.

"I put your boxers back on and I umm…left you there. I came back the next afternoon but you were gone. I called rehab and they put me through to your room. Matt answered the phone and said you were back."

Rayna put her head in her hands for a moment. _Just do it. You don't have a choice at this point. _"Okay, there is just no easy way to say this."

Deacon gave her a confused look as she continued. "Deacon….Deacon that night…that night Maddie was conceived." His expression didn't change but he sat up straighter in his chair, moving away from her. _He's in shock. _Rayna continued, feeling her heart fall. "Teddy and I didn't…we didn't sleep together until a few days before the wedding."

His voice broke with one syllable, "Ray."

Rayna couldn't stop the tears, "Deacon, I don't even know what to say."

Deacon stood up, his quick movements pushing the chair back as starting pacing. Rayna tried to interrupt but Deacon yelled at her to "shut up. Just SHUT UP."

"Deacon I…"

His voiced boomed in the small space. "YOU TELL ME. YOU TELL ME THAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE MY CHILD. MY CHILD RAY."

"I…"

Her voice was drowned out by his, "YOU TELL ME YOU DIDN'T HAVE MY CHILD AND THIRTEEN YEARS LATER DECIDE TO FINALLY DAMN TELL ME.…"

Rayna couldn't make herself say anything, while Deacon kept yelling at her. She listened as he yelled at her and begged her to tell her she was lying. Then he demanded she tell him, "You tell me that this isn't true. YOU TELL ME YOU DIDN'T LIE TO ME EVERY DAMN DAY. YOU TELL ME YOU DIDN'T GIVE MY CHILD TO SOME MAN."

Rayna didn't know how long he yelled but all of sudden he announced he couldn't even look at her anymore. She softly whispered that she loved him and that she "needed him."

His face was red with anger and his hands were shaking. But he looked at her, with tears in his eyes. "I don't even know what to do with that." She pressed her lips together, unsure of what to say. But when she tried to apologize, Deacon lost it again and started yelling at her.

Eventually, he stormed off, slamming the screen door behind him. Rayna heard him kick his truck and cuss out loud. She wrapped her arms around her chest and pulled her legs up to him. Eventually, she heard the car start and then nothingness. _He has never looked at me like that. Like he didn't even know who I was._ It was only then that she allowed herself to sink to the floor and cry.


	13. Chapter 13

**Wow. Thank you all for the comments and feedback with the last chapter. It truly means a lot!**

**Chapter 13**

**Louisville**

**Backstage **

Rayna watched Deacon walking away. He'd finally spoken to her, just a few words. But they were first words he'd spoken to her in four weeks. The words he'd said dripped with contempt and were brief. "Get out of the way." _But at least he finally spoke to me. That has to be something…right? A month of nothing and he finally said something._

As Deacon raced down the hall she met the gazes of several backup dancers. _Great. Apparently that was just as awkward as it felt. _

**Deacon's Hotel Room**

Deacon wiped his tired eyes, wanting to surrender to sleep that wasn't coming. He'd been at two different AA meetings today. The first one was this morning at the hospital. It had been crowded. He hadn't spoken but listened to several other stories.

_One woman talked about her kid being taken away by Child Protective Services. She'd cried describing how happy she'd been when she found out she was having a baby._ He'd never felt the urge to drink more after a meeting than before one. But today had been the exception.

The second meeting of the day had three people plus the leader. It had been in the meeting rooms of the public library.

He'd stood up and tried to express his feelings but he couldn't get out much. After the greeting and his statement of how long he'd been sober, Deacon realized he didn't know how to start. So he just sat down. On the way back to the hotel, he'd walked into one bar but managed to force himself to leave. He would have been tempted by the ABC stores too but luckily they were already closed.

Without undressing, he laid on the bed and tried to fight the only two thoughts he had. It was the only two things he'd thought about in weeks: Rayna and liquor. He picked up his phone and hit Coleman's name.

**Cleveland, OH**

**NBC-OH Studios**

Rayna smiled politely as the interviewer thanked her for being here. _She has the audacity to thank me after asking half a dozen questions that were supposed to be off-limits. The reporter had asked about: the divorce, Teddy's arrest, her relationship with Deacon and Liam, Matt Lawson's stories in the press, and how Maddie was doing since the kidnapping. Then she actually asked how I a managed to look so good 'at my age.' What a bitch._

She grabbed her phone. A missed text from Tandy let her know that Maddie had scored a goal during her game. She smiled at the thought.

**Juliette's Dressing Room**

Deacon looked at Coleman, asking why he was still in Ohio. "Don't you have a city to run? I hear the Mayor is heading to jail."

Coleman didn't directly answer the question and instead asked if he could sit down. "We didn't complete our conversation from earlier today."

The room was quiet but Rayna's voice echoed through the walls. They both paused a minute to listen to sound check before Coleman started, asking how he was doing.

Deacon shot him a look of disbelief. "Really that's the question you're going to ask me? I don't know Coleman. How do you think I'm doing?"

"Deacon, listen…"

"Save your shit Coleman. You knew…You knew that Maddie was mine and you never told me."

"I didn't know, I just...suspected."

"Nine months after you knew Ray and I were together, she had a baby. You knew I didn't remember and you never told me."

"Deacon, I know you are upset but…

"You went to their fucking wedding. She was pregnant with my child when she married him. YOU KNEW THAT." Deacon shook his head in anger. "The night before their wedding, I felt like I was dying. I cried for hours. I CRIED AT YOUR KITCHEN TABLE and you never thought to mention that she was pregnant with my daughter."

"You called me this morning because you walked into a bar last night with the intention of drinking. You said the meetings weren't helping like they normally do. I am here to help you. "

"You went to Maddie's Christening. You probably ate those damn puff things that I hate and smiled as Teddy took pictures of his little girl. You went to her damn birthday parties and her dance recitals. YOU LIED TO ME EVERY DAY." Coleman stayed quiet. "You know, I bet she played her guitar for you when you were over at the Belle Meade. Did you ever think, maybe Deacon would like to see her? Maybe Deacon would like to know his daughter likes playing the guitar?"

"Deacon you knew Maddie growing up, you know her. She knows you. She loves you. You saw her play guitar, you were invited her to birthday parties."

"She knew me? As what Uncle Deacon? As her mother's chump ex-boyfriend who followed her around like some stupid dog? As a roadie in her mom's band?"

"I know you are angry."

Deacon shook his head, trying to make the words come from his brain to his mouth. "Angry? No. For the last weeks I've realized that I truly trusted two people. You and Ray. I thought you both believed in me, believed in my sobriety, believed I'd changed."

"We did. We do."

Juliette walked back quickly, announcing it was time for sound check. Deacon grabbed his guitar and walked out of the room without another word.

Juliette politely smiled at Coleman. "Deacon told me about everything. And I'm making sure he stays as busy as he can. Tomorrow we are working on a new song and we've got a bunch of interviews and stuff…" Coleman admitted that was good but Juliette's polite smile turned into a frown. "Look I'm not trying to tell you what to do but Deacon doesn't want you or Rayna here. He doesn't have much of a choice with Rayna but you can bow out gracefully."

**Rayna's Penthouse Bathroom**

Rayna sat in her bathtub allowing the hot water to relax her tense muscles. She thought about her latest run-in with Deacon.

It had been this morning when they were all unloading in the front of the hotel. She'd jumped on the elevator, not realizing Deacon was already there. He'd looked straight ahead for the whole uncomfortable ride. She'd called his name twice but then the elevator dinged and he'd just walked away.

The first couple of days she'd given him space. Then she called him, texted him, gone to the cabin, gone to his house. He never came to the door, never answered the phone, nothing. Then they had gone back on tour. Every time she had approached him, he'd turned and walked away. When she would go to his hotel room, he'd never both coming to the door.

_I just never expected him to stay this angry for this long. He is still so mad that he can't even yell at me. _She'd worried someone would show up and serve her legal papers about Maddie. But he hadn't done that either.

He'd done nothing but ignore her for five and half weeks.

Rayna thought about texting the girls but she knew they were asleep by now. _I'll get Teddy. And_ _I really can't take another fight with Teddy about Deacon. Or a fight about his possible jail sentence. Or about how he should resign as Mayor. _

She leaned back against the bathtub, trying to relax. Her eyes finally closed, then flew open at the sound of banging to the front door. She heard Deacon's voice yelling her name and quickly jumped out the tub. She grabbed the white towel and tucked it around her body as she ran to open the door

Rayna pulled the material closer together when she saw Deacon's gaze towards the juncture of her thighs. She blushed and breathlessly invited him in.

Deacon shook his head, and leaned against the side door, putting his hands in his pocket. "A while ago, I was at a meeting and this woman was talking about how excited she was when she found out she was pregnant. And I realized, I didn't even know how you found out or how you felt about having my baby. Rayna felt water droplets fall down her legs as she continued to hold onto her towel. "I umm...had been really tired for a few days but brushed it off as just being emotionally exhausted. And I was sore..." She made a hand motion over her chest, "here. Then Tandy brought home this seafood dip stuff and I nearly threw up in the middle of the kitchen."

She expected a smile or acknowledgement from Deacon but found just a cold stare so she continued, "I um...I went upstairs and just knew. I figured I was late because of being tired and worried and I'd gotten off birth control. But then it was like a light bulb thing. I mean I thought I knew. When Tandy came upstairs to check on me, I told her. She went out and bought like 6 tests and brought them back."

She smiled remembering seeing the sticks lined up on the bathroom counter.

"Two were pink if pregnant, blue if not pregnant. One was two lines if pregnant, one line if not. Then another couple said a plus sign meant pregnant and a minus sign meant no baby. Then there was one really cheap looking test that said a circle if not pregnant and a star if it was a positive. I just kept looking at each test. There were pink lines and plus signs everywhere. I just kept looking at it, trying to make it sink in. And then the last test finally showed a star."

"A star?"

Rayna smiled, "Yeah I started crying when I saw it. It was happy crying and worried crying and overwhelmed crying. I came out of the bathroom and told Tandy, 'Deacon and I are having a star' and Tandy said the baby must take after its parents."

Rayna watched Deacon's lip shake and wrapped her arms around herself to keep from reaching out. Deacon kept looking at the floor, clearly lost in thought. She stood there naked, save the white towel hoping he'd asked to come in but instead he just kept looking down.

Deacon suddenly turned to leave and Rayna stepped out of the room. "Deacon…"

Harshly, Deacon yelled back, "Don't." He retreated down the hall quickly without another word. _Okay, that wasn't bad. He managed to talk to me for three minutes without yelling at me. Okay he managed to listen to me talk for three minutes and not yell. That is…progress? _She briefly thought about throwing on clothes and running after him but told herself not to.

She closed the door to hotel room and walked inside.


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you again for such wonderful comments! You all are wonderful! **

**Chapter 14**

**Richmond, Virginia**

Deacon pushed his way past the stagehands and the fans with backstage passes. He ignored his name being called as he sprinted towards the exit sign. He pushed the metal bar to open to door and a cold breeze whipped around him.

His throat was dry. His tongue felt swollen. He didn't need to see his hands to know they were shaking. _Go back in there. Go back on stage. Juliette needs me. The band needs me. _He leaned against the back wall of the coliseum and tried to steady himself.

Deacon heard the booming of the speakers through the walls. A few beats in, he heard the muffled sounds of 'Boys and Buses.' _Guess they don't really need me either. _

In his head he tried to list out the reasons to go back inside but the list was short. His thoughts were cloudy, too mixed up to form anything that made sense. He pushed himself off the wall and headed out into the dark night.

**Richmond City Jail**

5 hours later

Deacon swallowed harshly, recognizing the click of her heels. His eye was throbbing and was almost swollen shut . _Where in the hell is Juliette?_ He didn't look up as the bar screeched at being opened. The fat guy in the corner called Rayna by name, causing all dozen or so guys in the holding cell to look towards her. He heard her voice give that way too sugary "Hey Y'all" to the whole cell.

The prison guard called his last name. _Great. Just what I need. _Deacon didn't bother acknowledging her presence until the guard led them into a small room unstead of towards the front doors. _What in the hell is this? _A second later his questions were answered.

"Mrs. James, thank you so much for the autographs and the pictures. My wife is going to flip out when I show her these. I mean she was at the show tonight and I actually got to met ya."

"Bill you are so welcome. And let her know how awesome the crowd was tonight. I've always performing in Virgina."

The door closed behind the guard with the lock turning behind him. Only then did he face her, "Juliette is on her way to bail me out."

Rayna put her hand on her hip, "Who do you think called me?"

Deacon rolled his eyes for a minute and winced. He was so lost in the pain of his eye that he didn't notice her approaching him. He tensed as her hands touched his face and repositioned his head towards the light. When he tried to push her away she snapped at him to "stop before I punch you in the other one." She ordered for him to roll his eye as she assessed the damage. It was then he noticed the way her top clung to her breasts and the lingering scent of her perfume.

"It isn't anything major, but you won't be able to see out of it tomorrow."

He let himself relax against her for a moment before stiffening. _What in the h_e_ll am I doing? We are acting like it is 1997 and everything is just great between us. _He took a step back, "Can we go now?"

Rayna looked startled at how quickly the conversation had changed but then recomposed herself. _She never lost it for very long. _ Still, he could tell she was nervous. Her lips were pressed tightly together while she waited for the words to come. "I…I think we need to talk."

Deacon winced as he face contorted, sending a shooting pain to his eye. "I don't want to talk."

The two looked at each for moment, each waiting for the other to say something. Deacon finally lowered his head in defeat. "You can talk. I'm going to sit in the chair and ignore you."

Rayna let out a deep breath as Deacon pulled one of the metal chairs out. He sat down, straddling the back of the chair, giving her the floor. His eyes flashed with anger, he was looking for a fight.

**3 Minutes Later**

"I didn't drink tonight," warned Deacon.

"I know that. It has been a while but I know when you've been drinking." promised Rayna. "But you still went to a bar tonight after you left Juliette three songs into the set."

Deacon snapped back that it was none of her business what he did.

**15 minutes later**

Rayna yelled back, "I did go to see you. I went to the center to tell you about the baby."

Deacon scoffed, "Like hell you did."

"I did," Rayna insisted. "That is why I freaked out when Matt Lawson starting talking to the press."

Deacon put his hands on his waist, his eye hurt as did his head at this point, "Look I don't care at this point so just save it."

Rayna breathed out slowly, recalling the conversation. "You were in your group session when I got there. They buzzed your room and the Lawson kid came out. He told me how you talked about me all the time. "

Deacon's jaw tightened. _God that sounded pathetic. _

"He said you were doing well, that you'd been sober for 56 days."

Deacon spat back, "Oh and that didn't live up to Rayna James' standards?"

Rayna shook her head, "He told me you wanted to get sober for me. That you talked about it all the time, how we were going to be together once you got out of rehab."

"And that was a bad thing?" he asked quietly.

Her voice shook with the tears she was holding in. "The first four times you went to rehab you were going for me. When I dropped you off the fifth time, you were going for me then too. Deacon…if you knew about the baby, you'd want to get sober for her too."

"AND? GOD FORBID I GET SOBER FOR MY CHILD."

"I COULDN'T DO THAT TO YOU." She quieted a little, "I couldn't do that to her." She stomped her foot in frustration. "I couldn't have your child be the reason you got sober. I couldn't watch you blame yourself for failing your child if you drank again. I couldn't watch your child wonder what she'd done wrong to cause you to drink again."Rayna wiped the falling tears away, knowing her crying was doing nothing but pissing him off. "

Do you remember the night you drank after your fourth trip to rehab? You'd been clean for months, three months there and then almost three months at home." Deacon looked at her waiting for her to keep going. "When I brought you home that night, I cried for hours in the bathroom. And for days after that, I tried to figure out what I had done or not done or what I should have said or how I messed up."

"Ray…"

"No. I need you to understand. I get logically alcoholism is a disease. That it is never my fault or Vince's fault or anyone else's… but you were fine. You were good. We were good. and everything was good. Then you weren't. And I blamed myself. Like I did every day you got drunk."

Deacon scoffed, "I've told you a million times, it isn't about you. My addiction has never been about you…

She knew her voice was louder than it needed to be but she couldn't help it. "How is it not about me? How would it not have been about her? Seriously, Deacon. How can I not blame myself? You've been sober since we've broken up. We get back together and you start ordering drinks in bars and getting into fights with guys twice your size."

Deacon punched the air, feeling himself growing angrier. _I ordered the drink. I got into a fight cause I couldn't stop myself from drinking any other way._

He hated having this conversation with her. _They'd had for fifteen years. _Why couldn't she understand his drinking wasn't about her?

He took a moment to clear his head, "Look, I am done with whatever this is. I don't want to keep going around in circles with you." Deacon banged on the door loudly and waited for the guard to show back up. He started walking towards the front lobby as Rayna ran to keep up with him.

**The Hotel Elevator **

The cab ride was quiet and uneventful but then her hand brushed against his. He'd let her fingers linger for a moment before pulling his hand away. Then he'd helped her out of the cab and opened the door to the hotel. They both got into the same elevator and he felt the air shift. Deacon pushed the button for the 11th floor, then for her he pressed the 19th..

He knew without looking at her that she wanted to ask. Hell, he was half hoping she'd ask and half hoping she would just let it be for now.

"Deacon, you don't have to go back to your room."

_Okay she asked, well sorta asked. _He stole a glance at her. She was looking straight ahead but her body was tense and he could tell she was close to tears.

He wanted to yell at her, to make some smart ass comment but instead he sighed. _God he wanted to go with her, just get lost in her for a while. Forget she'd lied to him. Forget she let him miss his daughter's life. Forget she chose some stranger to raise her child and be her husband over him. _

He felt her body close the space between them, unwilling to stop her. She pressed her chest against his and whispered his name against his neck. He didn't touch her, holding onto the chair rail of the elevator to stop himself. Deacon closed his eyes as she pressed her lips against the corner of his mouth. Her lips lingered there for a second before moving slightly. She kissed him hard and let her hands move up his shoulders to pull him closer. She groaned when he finally wrapped his arms around her ass and pulled her against him.

But just as quick he pulled her off of him. He looked at her confused expression.

He sadly asked, "What is this going to fix?"

She whispered, "I don't know, but I miss you."

Deacon felt his anger rise back up. _Who in the hell does she think she is?_ She felt his hot breath against her cheek before he moved away from her. "Yeah well I missed the first thirteen years of my daughter's life so I guess you can figure out a way to deal with it."

She looked like she'd been smacked in the face. The elevator dinged and he walked off, without a backwards glance to Rayna. He heard the doors close and closed his eyes. _I should go after her. I should apologize for being a complete asshole. He'd tried to hurt her and he knew he had succeeded._

As Deacon rounded the corner to his room, he was surprised to see someone already standing at the door knocking. His eyes narrowed when he realized who it was. _Don't do anything stupid, _he warned himself. A second later he shrugged, w_hat the hell? _as he approached the door and the woman standing in front of it.


	15. Chapter 15

First, Sorry this update is a few days later than I hoped. Traditionally work gets really busy about 1 time a month. That was this week for me. This chapter is long and was suppose to be about twice as long. I will post Chapter 16 tomorrow as it is done. Thank you all for your comments and encouragements.

**CHAPTER 15**

**Deacon's Hotel Room**

Deacon watched Juliette storm out the hotel room. _All she'd been doing was checking to make sure I'd gotten home from jail. And then I had to go and kiss her. She'd been receptive. Okay she'd be surprised at first then receptive. _They'd gotten inside before he pulled his own shirt off. She'd been into it. Thinking about it now, his pathetic come on was probably less arousing than getting to bed the man her mama had a thing for. _F'd up logic at its worst but it didn't seem to bother him too much at the time._

_Then he stupidly gotten a little too lost in the moment. _He'd whispered Rayna's name when she started kissing his neck.

And that had done it.

He leaned back against the bed, finally too tired to think. He knew he should put some ice on his eye but the pain felt comforting in his own twisted logic way. _Juliette was just another thing, another relationship he'd messed up. _

Another in a long list of people he cared about and people he used. He closed his eyes and laid down on the bed. He'd figure it all out later.

**NASHVILLE-2 days later**

**The Diner**

Deacon knew Coleman was waiting on him to speak. The waitress refilled both coffees before heading back to the register. The place was empty save an older couple in the corner and a truck driver flirting with their waitress.

Deacon took a sip and started with a simple declaration, "I'm a father." A moment of quiet passed. "I'm a father to a teenage girl, who already has a dad. I woke up this morning and I think it hit me. I've been focused on the lying and me and Ray. I've been reliving stuff that happened in the past as opposed to figuring out what to do now."

Coleman repeated the beginning of the serenity prayer solemnly: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

Deacon nodded slowly. "I'm lacking the wisdom to know the difference right now."

Coleman took another sip of his coffee, allowing Deacon a moment to think. "So what do you want to do about it?"

**The Cabin**

Deacon watched as Rayna opened the screen door. He could tell she was nervous, the way her lips were pressed together and the way she clinched her hands. He scooted further away, inviting her to sit down beside him on the porch swing. "Thank you for comin."

The two sat in relative silence, swinging for a few moments. "I'm checking myself into rehab tomorrow."

Rayna whipped her head around to face him. He met her worried gaze and smiled. "I didn't drink. But you saw me that night in jail. Ray, I hadn't wanted to drink this much in a really long time. And I keep doing things without thinking. I know where that leads."

"So you are going in for what? a tune up?"

He smiled at the analogy. "Yeah I guess so. There is a place east of Dayton. It is really private and Coleman's got a friend who is on the board there."

"How long?"

"A month."

"A month? Deacon what about the tour? What about.."

"I need to go Ray. I need to go for me. I need to go for us. I don't know where we stand right now but I can't do any of this unless I get on steadier ground."

He heard her sniffling and could feel her body shaking with a sob. He lifted his arm, wrapping it around her shoulder and pulled her closer. He let his hand travel up and down her shoulder, letting her cry into the crook of his neck. Deacon felt his own eyes sting with tears. _This was a road they'd both been down before. _

**3 Hours Later**

The warm afternoon had turned into a cool evening. But now the sky was more black than purple. She'd ended up with her head in his lap and her feet hanging off the end of the swing. It was intimate, a position that lovers sat in. It was how they use to swing all the time.

They'd spent most of the last few hours on the porch talking. Deacon admitted he wanted to get to know Maddie. She told him about Maddie's crush and how terrible her soccer team was. He'd told her about encounter with Juliette. She was hardly pleased but did smile when Deacon told her why it ended.

"So how often do you call out my name when you're kissing other women?"

" 'bout as often as you think of me when you're in bed with somebody else."

"That often, huh?"

Deacon's chest rumbled with laughter.

"So are you allowed visits or phone calls at this tune up rehab?"

Deacon ran his hands through her hair, "Not the first two weeks. But after that we can get regulated phone calls."

"So no phone sex?"

"Nope. But you I can take several pictures with me so if you have anything you'd like to contribute…" His voice was light and flirty. _I've missed that voice. I missed this. _

She met his gaze and admitted she didn't want to push. "But this feels like we're us again." He stroked her hair and told her couldn't make any promises right now. She wasn't thrilled with his response but she'd take what she could get at this point.

**Day 1**

"He's all checked in. I left him about twenty minutes ago. Deacon says not to worry and he'll call you when he gets phone privileges."

"Thanks Coleman."

**Day 2 **

Deacon leaned forward in his plastic chair, preparing to answer the group leader's question.

"I'm Deacon. I've been sober for 155 months and six days. But lately I've been fighting a losing battle with myself. I almost ordered a drink the other night at a bar. I went there to drink and I jumped on this guy because I knew he'd kick my ass." He laughed at himself, "I didn't know how to not drink and that was the first time in a long time, that has happened."

**Day 3**

Rayna put her headphones off and made thumbs up to the control booth. _The song sounded good. _Liam asked if she needed a break but she shook her head. _The last thing she needed was a break. _

**Day 4**

Deacon's one-on-one therapy session had lasted almost two hours. Dr. Peter had point blank asked if he had come to rehab to help solve his problems or to run away from them.

_Dr. Peter did have a point; he just wasn't sure what the actual answer to that question was._

**Day 5**

Rayna rolled her eyes as Juliette continued to re-aloud the "Top 25 Places to Have Sex in your Own Town." _Seriously, what have I done to deserve being stuck on a plane, having to listen to this stupid list. _

Juliette's voice screeched with laughter, "Number 16 is a Hammock. Pu…lease. Nobody can have sex in one of those things."

Rayna smirked, "Actually the key is to not lay down in it. It has to be more of a sitting position."

Buck gave her a surprised look and Liam's eyes lit up. Rayna gave an unapologetic shrug to Juliette and asked her to continue.

**Day 6**

Deacon strummed his fingers against the guitar and took his pen to write down the next few chords. The song wasn't about Rayna. It was an apology to Juliette. When they first met, he used her for his ego. She was young and pretty and made Rayna incredibly jealous. She viewed him as a stabilizing person in her life. That was something he'd had never been before. He'd liked that Juliette depended on him. _ And I used to her get back on tour with Rayna. I used her to try and get Ray out of mind mind. She didn't deserve that, she doesn't deserve that. _

**Day 7**

Rayna groaned in frustration and grabbed the pillow beside her. It was another one of _those _dreams. Lately she'd had a lot of them and they were getting nakeder and sweatier. She missed him. She missed his voice, his smell, his hands.

"Ugh." Rayna got up and headed to the shower. If the cold shower didn't do the trick, the removable shower head would.

**Day 8 **

Deacon thanked Greg. Greg had a fifteen year old daughter. She lived with her mom and been raised by Greg's ex-wife and her new husband. He only got to see his daughter a few times a year but he had good advice. _Don't tease her about boyfriends. Don't comment on her clothes, seriously if you like it she'll hate it. If you hate it, she'll love it. The more you react to it, the worse it is. And then she'll throw it into your face that you have no right to say anything. She's a teenage girl, she's always looking for a fight so try not to give her one. _

**Day 9**

"The offer includes six months in a federal prison and then four years of parole."

Rayna felt her legs give under her.

"Are you taking it?"

A long moment of silence passed. _He sounds like he's been crying. _The phone went dead a moment later.

_Teddy in prison? _That was the last thing she wanted. The girls would be devastated not being able to see him for six months. Except for family visits. _Oh God. My daughters at a prison. Visiting their father. _She couldn't help the tears that started to fall.

**Day 10 **

Deacon laughed out loud as his roommate kept pushing for details, "Oh come on. Give me details. You were a guy, with a guitar, in Nashville. You had roadies. You have to have some good stories."

Deacon shook his head, "Sorry I don't kiss and tell. Besides I spent almost a decade I was with Ray."

The dark haired man grew serious. "You never cheated on her?"

Deacon shook his head, "No sir, didn't even think about it. Beside she would have literally killed me and made it as painful as possible."

**Day 11**

Rayna pushed play again, listening to the haunting sounds of 'If I didn't know better'. It was perfect. She quickly grabbed her phone to call Edgehill to set up a meeting.

**Day 12**

"The truth is I miss her. She's always been the most important person in my life. For years, I waited for her to be free of Teddy. Now she is and we aren't together."

Dr. Peter made another note on his pad before commenting, "The reason you two aren't together is because she lied to you about the paternity of your daughter."

Deacon shifted uncomfortably. He had never done well with anybody else attacking Rayna. Even if he had the exact same opinion, he hated when anybody else said a bad word about her. "Look she lied and I know that. But she had her reasons."

The doctor asked what her reasons were.

"I wasn't a functioning alcoholic, you know like some people are. I blacked out. It wasn't that I was always drinking, it was I was always drunk. I wouldn't be able to hold my guitar anymore and I would slur my words. I was always getting into fights and cussing out cops. She was pulling me out of hotels and bars every week."

The doctor readjusted his glasses as he continued to make notes.

**Day 13**

"So you have no idea where anything stands right now?"

Rayna shook her head at Liam. "Nope. Deacon gets phone privileges starting tomorrow. I kinda wish I didn't know that. Because now, I'll be waiting on pins and needles to see if he calls."

"And if he doesn't?"

Rayna found it hard to swallow. "I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get there."

**Day 14**

Deacon knew Rayna's voicemail was going to pick up. By now, she was either on stage or waiting in the wings. He listened to the melody of her voice, realizing how long it had been since he heard her voice.

"Hey Ray, its me. I wanted to call you earlier but my group had lunch duty so I was cooking. I um….I just wanted you to know things are good here. I'm good here. I miss you and I'll try to call you earlier tomorrow.


	16. Chapter 16

**Thank you all for your comments. I was going to post it last night but we've had a influx of new chapters (YAY!) Thanks for the continued comments and reviews!**

**Chapter 16**

**Day 15**

Rayna smiled to herself as she picked up the phone with a "hey."

"Hi."

She sighed, relaxing at his voice. She could sense he felt the same way. "You have no idea how much I have missed you."

"I think I have some idea," he grinned.

The two caught up quickly. He told her about Dr Peter and the guys he'd gotten close to over the first two weeks. She told him about the progress her album was making and how amazing Scarlett and Gunner sounded on their first tracks. Well before either wanted to hang up, Deacon shared that his 20 minutes was up. Rayna wanted to say she missed him but instead she told him she missed him again. He smiled into the phone. "I love you and I miss you too."

Rayna felt her eyes fill with tears.

**Day 16**

Deacon admitted he didn't know the answers to Dr. Peter's questions. He didn't know exactly when Rayna decided to lie about Teddy being Maddie's father. He didn't know whose idea it was or exactly what the timeline of events was.

"and that doesn't bother you?"

Deacon shrugged, "a lot of things bother me about it. But that is why I'm here."

**Day 17**

Rayna smiled politely as she ignored the cameras being thrown in her face. They were asking questions about Deacon's absence from the tour as well as some new interview Matt Lawson had given.

_God. Is this ever going to end?_

**Day 18**

Deacon left small group feeling frustrated. Rayna admitted the night before that several tabloids were reporting that Juliette fired him or that he'd gone on another bender.

He could hear the strain and aggravation in Ray's voice. _Is it selfish that I'm in here while everyone else is covering for me?_

**Day 19**

Backstage

Juliette shook her head in frustration and asked Rayna what she should do. Rayna gave the blonde an odd look. "You are asking me for advice?"

Juliette shrugged. Her voice horse with worry and stress, "I'm desperate."

Rayna smiled and sighed. "What exactly did Edgehill say about the songs?"

"Well for starters they gave me a condescending speech about how it is exciting that I'm trying to spread my wings and try new things but sometimes baby birds weren't ready to fly yet. Then they gave me a demo for a song that is exactly what I was trying to get away from. It is an awful song."

"Well for starters, don't record that song. Trust me, you record it and it will be on your album with or without your permission. You need that song as a bargaining chip. Like if they let you pick the rest of them, you'll agree it can be your third single. Secondly, you need to figure out which battles you are willing to concede."

"What do you mean?"

Rayna smiled, "How about after the concert, you come to my room and we'll order room service?"

**Day 20**

Deacon smiled at Scarlett's postcard. It was quick and sweet.

**Day 21**

Rayna apologized to Bucky for snapping at him. "I'm just in a mood."

"You've been under a lot of stress lately. But we need to make some decisions about publicity for the next album. This tour is only eight more shows."

**Day 22**

Deacon smiled into the phone, enjoying listening to Rayna ranting.

"Are you actually defending Juliette to Marshall Evans?"

"Well you know me, I never mind a fight. And Marshall Evans is an idiot. Deacon, I swear he told me that 'Boys and Buses' was actually one of the most innovative songs on country radio in the last few years."

Deacon laughed, "Well you know to be fair before I heard the song, I didn't know that boys and buses had that much in common but ever since I heard the song I keep comparing 'em."

"You think you're being cute," laughed Rayna.

Deacon's voice got lower. "I know I'm being cute."

**Day 23**

Deacon strummed his fingers against the chair, feeling anxious. Dr. Peter was wrong. Rayna wasn't an addiction. It was something he'd heard other people say. It was something Rayna worried about herself. But she wasn't. She had been the best thing that ever happened to him. _Why couldn't people just understand that._

**Day 24**

"I'm horny," she confessed into the phone.

Deacon spit out the water he just took a sip of water and asked Rayna to repeat what she said.

"We were having sex and now I'm not having sex. And now Juliette is obsessed with these lists and quizzes in the magazines and she keeps reading them out loud and it just makes me think about it."

"Wait? What? What did…."

Rayna interrupted that Tandy was calling her and said she had to go because it was probably about the girls. "I gotta go. I love you and call me tomorrow."

Deacon made a sound of frustration before he heard a dial tone.

**Day 25**

"I talked to Teddy and he is very unhappy about it but he has relented to letting you and Maddie spend some time together. He still is adamant that Maddie not know the truth for now."

Deacon admitted he was nervous but Rayna insisted he shouldn't be. "She knows you. She loves you already."

**Day 26**

"So what are your expectations when you go back on the road?" asked Dr. Peter.

"My expectations?"

"What are you expecting your relationship to entail with Rayna? Are you two planning on resuming your sexual relationship? Will you two have a monogamous relationship? Do you plan on continuing working with Juliette exclusively or are you going to go back to being Rayna's band leader. And what about where you will stand with both Maddie and Rayna's other child?"

Deacon paused. He admitted he wanted to resume his relationship with Rayna but he didn't know the rest of it.

The psychiatrist paused for a moment and gave Deacon a concerned look. "Deacon. You've been here for almost four weeks and I don't think you are any closer to figuring out how you want to deal with the betrayal than when you've found out about."

**Day 27**

Rayna eyed the black lace of the bra and smirked. She ran the material through her fingers, knowing it was the right style. _Sexy but not trying to hard. _It was the perfect lingerie for tomorrow night. She smiled thinking about seeing Deacon again. _It will be tough but I know once he's back here it will be alright._

**Day 28**

Deacon jumped in the passenger seat and thanked Coleman for picking him up. Coleman confirmed Deacon's flight boarded at 2:30 from the airport in Dayton. The two caught up on the happenings in Nashville. None of it sounded good for Teddy. Which means none of it was good for the girls or for Rayna.

"I've made a decision about me and Ray."

Coleman let out a knowing smile, "and?"

Deacon stopped, taking a moment to look out the window at the landscape. "I want to be with her. I want to try and make it work." Coleman nodded, "alright then. Let's go."

**Toronto **

**Rayna's Penthouse**

Deacon had called fifty minutes ago from the cab. Even with the worst traffic, he should have been here by now. She threw open the door a few seconds after she heard the knock.

Rayna knew it would be better to show restraint but without thinking her arms were wrapped around his neck and her body was pressed tightly against him.

"Easy, easy," Deacon laughed as he was forced to put his bag on the ground to accommodate Rayna.

He wrapped his arms around her waist, realizing she wasn't letting. He whispered that she smelled good.

She returned the compliment with "you feel good." She groaned and pulled away but delighted in the fact that his hands stayed on her hips.

"We have to leave for the coliseum in like ten minutes."

Deacon nodded, "Yeah and then maybe afterwards we can talk?"

Rayna nodded, "Yes definitely."

Deacon grinned and Rayna smiled at him brightly.

**6 Hours Later**

Rayna came back from her bedroom, trying to hide how jumpy she was. They'd gotten back a few minutes ago but her dress was not the most comfortable thing to have a conversation in. Now she was in her cotton shirt and jeans. She had run a brush through her hair but hadn't bothered reapplying her makeup.

She plopped down on the couch beside Deacon. She happily said, "Okay. Let's talk."

Deacon looked into her eyes for a moment and smiled. "You are so beautiful."

She squinted her eyes, not really understanding where he was going with this. Deacon swallowed harshly and then let out a sad smile. "I need more time."

Rayna's eyes widened but showed no other expression. "I don't…I don't understand."

Deacon breathed out. "I'm sorry, I just thought I could do this. I thought because I loved you and because you wanted to be with me that I could just move forward. But tonight I just realized, I still have a lot of questions and I'm still not over it."

Rayna looked down at her hands feeling her world collapse. "I see."

Deacon reached his hand out to take hers, "Ray, I'm trying. I really am." She nodded, still unwilling to look at him. He asked her to look at him twice before her eyes met his. He apologized again and started explaining himself but she interrupted. He used the words "lies" and "trust" and "backwards".

She calmly interrupted, "I don't understand. You told Coleman like twelve hours ago that you wanted to be with me. Even at the cabin the night before you went to rehab, we were back together. Okay, I know we didn't kiss or make love but we were back together. Or almost back together. And we've talked every night on the phone and it was US talking. US talking about OUR relationship."

"You talked to Coleman?"

Rayna looked up at the ceiling trying not to cry. "No Coleman had dinner with Tandy and whatever he said to her made her call me. And Tandy called me while Juliette was on stage."

Deacon apologized.

"Was it something I did tonight?"

Deacon let out a frustrated sigh. _What in the hell am I doing? Maybe I should ignore Dr. Peter's words and be fucking happy. _"No it was nothing you did tonight."

Her voice cracked, "then what is it?"

"Ray I just think that, that I fell back into us again. Rayna in the last month all I was doing was trying to find a way to get over you lying to me."

Her tone was angrier, "and that is a bad thing because?"

Deacon stood up, "Because maybe I shouldn't be trying to get over it. Even tonight, I just fell back into being with you."

Rayna gave him a confused expression. "So let me get this straight. You love me. You want to forgive me. You were all set to try and make this work. And therefore, you don't want to be with me?"

The next few minutes were spent with Rayna getting louder and more upset. Deacon was getting more frustrated as nothing he said seemed to be making sense to her. Rayna wiped her nose with the back of her hand. Her voice cracked with sadness and confusion. "So how much time are we talking about?"

"I don't know Ray."

"Are you planning on seeing other people?"

"No, Ray it isn't like that."

"Am I allowed to talk to you or are we going back to when you'd just walk away from me?"

Deacon said her name in an apology twice but offered her no answers.

Ray let out a frustrated sob. "You know what? Why don't you go figure out exactly what you want from me and then get back to me whenever."

Deacon could see how upset she was getting and asked her to take a breath.

"Are you punishing me? Is that what this is?"

"No."

"I don't understand. Based on our phone calls and the cabin and earlier tonight, we were getting back together. I knew it was going to be hard and we would have issues but I don't get this."

"I don't know Ray, I've just…I just..."

She interrupted him. "You know what? I can't do this with you tonight."

"Ray…"

"No. You need to leave."

Deacon could tell she was on the verge of breaking down. He wanted to stay but knew he would only make it worse. Before he could say anything else, she was already walking towards the bedroom. As the door closed behind him, he regretted it instantly.

He knocked on the door for a few moments before Rayna answered. Her face was wet with tears and she looked defeated. He instantly wanted to make it all better.

"Please don't cry about this."

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. She let a tear roll down her check. "I still don't get this. I don't get what you want."

"I need to know everything."

"Everything?"

Deacon confirmed "everything. I keep trying to forget that you lied to me. But it isn't working because I can't forget. I need to know exactly what happened."

He saw her confused face. "I need to know exactly how you went from coming to tell me about being pregnant to marrying Teddy."

"Okay." She opened the door and let him in. _This was definitely not the night she had planned. _


	17. Chapter 17

Thank you all for your continued comments and support!

**CHAPTER 17 **

**Rayna's Hotel Room**

**11:45 pm**

"I need you to promise me something."

Deacon raised an eyebrow in a question, wondering what the hell she was demanding considering the situation.

"I need you to promise me that you won't leave until we have finished talking."

He shook his head 'no' but she shook her head 'yes'. "I need you to promise me that much. We can't keep having conversations where you walk away from me."

"Fine."

**12:00 am**

"I just don't understand…Ray, I proposed to you multiple times. And Teddy proposes a few months after you two met and you jump at it."

Rayna put her hand on her hip in disbelief, "Are you kiddin' me? Those were not proposals. Those were you being drunk out of your mind and musing about us being married."

**12: 45 am**

Rayna put her head in his hands, ""Look Teddy knew I was in love with you. But he could also see how exhausted I was and how I was trying to move past you. Teddy and I were on a date when Matt Lawson called and told me about you leaving rehab."

Deacon remained silent as Rayna continued. "The next day, he came over to Tandy's place. I was really upset and he knew. He could just tell something happened between us, it was written all over my face."

Deacon scuffed, "So you felt it was okay to tell Teddy that you and I had sex? But didn't feel you needed to tell me. Makes perfect sense Ray."

Rayna gave him a look of warning, "Do you want to hear this or not?" Deacon said nothing allowing her to continue. "We weren't serious at that point but I apologized to him. He said he knew what he was getting into and said he couldn't understand what I was doing."

"Doing?"

Rayna snorted, "Yeah something to the effect of: "I don't get why a woman who wins Grammys and sells millions of records and who is smart and funny would rather spend her nights in seedy motel room than…"

Deacon yelled his interruption, "NO YOU DON'T GET TO DO THIS. You are NOT THE VICTIM HERE."

**1: 20 am**

"YOU BARELY KNEW HIM. AND YOU LET HIM RAISE OUR DAUGHTER."

"Teddy loved me, he was in love with me. He was stable. He had a valid driver's license. His oven didn't have a bottle of liquor hidden in it. He could get to work on time. He could be the DD when I wanted a glass of wine. "

Deacon apologized sarcastically. "Well I guess he was just Prince Charming, riding in on his white horse and rescuing you from big, bad me."

Rayna nodded, "It felt like that. It did." She walked over to where he sitting and bent down in front of him. She put one hand on his knee and lifted his chin with the other. Their eyes met.

"Deacon, I cried myself to sleep on the good nights. Those were the nights you were home and passed out. And when I couldn't find you…I paced the floor and cried and kept calling all the hospitals and police departments. "

"Ray…"

"You broke me. And you didn't mean to, but you did." She saw tears in his eyes, wishing she could stop this but knew she had to make him understand. She allowed herself a moment to gather her thoughts before continuing.

Her voice broke with half audible words. "I couldn't remember what it was like to kiss you when you didn't taste like beer or liquor. I couldn't remember what it was like to not jump when the phone rang. I was lonely and scared and desperate for you to be okay. But I couldn't help you anymore and that was the worst feeling in the entire world. I could see how much you were hurting and you could see how much you were hurting me. And it didn't matter. "

A tear rolled down his cheek as he looked down at the floor. She softly admitted she didn't like talking about this. His voice broke the quiet.

"It nearly killed me you married him. I felt like I was breaking in two. "

She nodded sadly, "I know."

"Do you ever regret lying to me? Did you ever even think, hmmm Deacon is sober now and has been for six months? Three years? A damn decade?"

"I don't even know how to answer that question. It wasn't like I saw Maddie as your child or his child. She was my baby. And I love her because of that. And for the million or so cute things she did or said. And Teddy was her dad. It wasn't a lie. He really did raise her and he loves her. Despite everything else, he is a wonderful father."

Deacon groaned but Rayna stopped him. "But if you are asking did I ever regret lying to you, then of course I did. You know that."

Deacon clinched his jaw, "Well obviously I thought I knew a lot of things that weren't true."

**2: 05 am**

"I don't know Ray. YOU ACT AS THOUGH I SHOULD BE OVER BY NOW."

She threw her hands up in the air, "I never said that."

"Really? 'cause you're acting like you had no choice. Poor put upon Rayna, forced to lie to her stupid drunk boyfriend for years."

**3:15 am**

Deacon walked over to the sink and splashed water on his face. He was tired and his head was spinning with Rayna's voice and painful memories. He looked in the mirror, noticing how red eyes his eyes were. Then his eyes shifted to Rayna's reflection.

She was crying silently on the couch. Her face was splotchy and she looked every bit as tired as he felt. This conversation was going around in circles. They had yelled at each other and cried to themselves. Every time they were getting somewhere, he'd managed to yell or make some smartass comment that started the whole thing back up.

Deacon turned around and told her he needed to get going.

She looked up at him, clearly upset for a second before bursting into tears. "You told me you weren't leaving til we were finished talking."

"Ray I'm tired, you're tired. We aren't getting anywhere."

"You promised." When he looked at her in annoyance she started to cry to harder. "You promised that you wouldn't leave until…. You promised."

"Ray…"

Her voice strained, "No you aren't even trying anymore."

**3: 39 am**

Deacon tried to relax against the mattress, surprised at how quickly Rayna had fallen asleep. He knew this was a bad idea but then Rayna started flipping out about him leaving. Instead of going round 98 with her or leaving, this was the only solution that worked.

He shifted a little, trying to make himself more comfortable. It didn't work. Ray was practically on top of him, clinching his shirt in one hand and every time he moved, her leg shifted higher up, over his waist.

He shifted again causing her to shift again. He let an unsteady breath out and decided to focus on ceiling. _Maybe that will help me relax. _

**6:45 am**

Rayna groaned as she tried to open her eyes. Her hand was numb and her thigh and her back ached. As she moved, she froze. Deacon was under her. She moved her head from his chest and looked up at him, surprised to see him looking back at her.

He whispered "morning" as his hand tucked her untamed hair behind her ear. Her chin rested on his rib cage and the two looked at each for a silent moment.

She moved her head to rest against his chest again and closed her eyes. _If Deacon was inclined to stay where he was, I can deal with her arm falling asleep. _

**9:22 am**

Rayna sat up, feeling the hooks of her bra digging into her back. Her head hurt, like a bad hangover and her face was swollen from the crying she'd done last night, well technically this morning.

Deacon was still asleep, not even moving as she dislodged herself. She was surprised he was still here. She texted Bucky, claiming she wasn't feeling well and asking him to clear her schedule until the show tonight.

She slowly stood up and padded over to the bathroom. _The only reason he stayed last night is because I was screaming at him and I guilted him into. He's not any closer to actually forgiving me. _

**10:05 am**

Deacon listened to the water cut off. He'd been awake for at least twenty minutes but couldn't make himself get up. _It would be easier if he would just get up and leave now. _He listened to her feet patter around the tile floor for a minute before the light from the bathroom blinded him.

He titled his head to the side, watching as Rayna walked out in a white fluffy robe. Her hair was down and wet. She looked, miserable.

"You were in the shower for a long time?"

Rayna made a "mhmmm" noise without bothering to say anything else. She walked over to the sink, taking a brush and ran it through her wet hair. She knew Deacon was staring at her back but didn't care. If he wanted to say something, he could.

She continued to keep herself busy, putting lotion on her legs, drying her hair, putting her makeup on but dared not to look back at him. She'd gotten so use to the quiet that she nearly poked herself in the eye with her mascara brush when he said her name.

She didn't turn around and instead busied herself with her picking out a lipstick color. She heard her name louder a second time, then a third. Annoyed she spun around and glared at Deacon.

"What?"

"You are mad at me now?" _He was confused. Hell I am confused. _

Ray tugged at the tie on her bathrobe and huffed. She didn't know why she was being crabby and fussy but she couldn't help it.

She shrugged, "I'm confused." She saw his eyes soften.

He softly admitted a "me too."

She shook her head in frustration, "It's been months Deacon. I know you are mad at me and I know I hurt you. And I'm not asking for you to forget your feelings but…I'm asking for you to start trying to get past this."

He let out a long sigh, "Ray, I'm trying."

"Really? Cause last night every time I explained or tried to explain anything you started yelling, again."

He groaned her name but she continued.

"No. Last night I basically yelled like a crazy person to stop you from leaving. But the truth is, I don't even know why I did that. We aren't getting anywhere. And you staying here last night was just, just more confusing than anything."

He ran a frustrated hand along the back of back of his neck and asked what she meant.

Her voice strained, "It means I need to know if you are serious about this or if this is just us doing another song. "

Deacon stood up annoyed and asked if she was giving an ultimatum. She said nothing but walked back into the bathroom. She waited a few a moments, hearing the front door of the room slam shut. She felt her knees give way and ended up crying on the bathroom floor.

**10:55 am**

Rayna wiped her nose with the bathrobe and pulled herself to stand. She was tired and her head ached and her heart felt like it would burst. _Deacon can't get over this and I was an idiot to think he could. _

She stopped short, seeing Deacon sitting on the side of the bed, where she'd left him thirty minutes before. She gasped.

"I heard the door, I thought you left."

Deacon nodded, "I got up to leave and opened the door. But I realized that no matter what happens here, I would rather be here with you than anywhere out there."

Rayna let a smile spread across her face. "You should write that down. It would make a pretty song."

He smiled back. "Actually I'm not in the mood for writing right now."

She felt her body relax in relief at the playful tone of his voice and the way his eyes sparkled. Her stomach growled causing them both to let out a soft laugh.

He told her to get dressed, "and then we'll get some lunch."

Rayna couldn't stop the happy tears as she nodded, "Yeah that sounds good."


	18. Chapter 18

**First, so sorry this update is so long coming. Had a bit of writer's block and work has been bananas. **

**CHAPTER 18 **

**New York **

**Juliette's Hotel Room**

Deacon smiled to himself while Juliette continued to squeal and jump around. Edgehill was caving on two of Juliette's new demands. That meant four of his songs would be on the album, maybe a fifth if Marshall Evans decided on thirteen tracks as opposed to twelve. _It did feel good to know more of his music was about to be released.  
_

Juliette cocked an eyebrow as she asked what his plans were for the rest of the afternoon. He shrugged but Juliette smiled knowingly. She asked what was going on between he and Rayna.

"We are working things out."

"And what exactly does this mean?"

"It means, we are workin' things out."

Julliette huffed and said she deserved specifics, "It means, we're back together. We're doing what we use to do and working through our problems together." Deacon turned to leave the hotel room and headed back to his own. The truth was, they were more than just working things out. They were almost back to themselves again. They spent their time together talking through everything. He was still angry and hurt and about a million other things but he could talk about it with her now.

And they'd talked about a lot of things. They'd talked about her marriage, his random relationships, his fears on his sobriety, and her fears about the same. They'd listened to close to a hundred demos from potential new artists. He helped her narrow down the songs for the new album before she and Liam made the final cut. She'd even helped him finish a song he'd started with Juliette that was lacking something. T

The truth was, he was finally at peace again, the kind that he only had when he was sober and with Rayna.

**Deacon's Hotel Room**

2 hours later

Deacon groaned into Rayna's mouth, causing a shiver to go through her. His hand cupped her breast through her shirt as his other hand reached down to waistband of her skirt.

Rayna pushed his hand away and broke the kiss. "We agreed."

Deacon leaned into Rayna, seeking out her kiss again. Her lips pressed against her again, talking against her. "We can un-agree."

Rayna happily laughed, leaning into his kiss once more. She drew away just as quickly, "Nope. We agreed. We have two weeks left on the tour and that we would use this time to work on us…sans the sex."

He suggested they could always change their mind.

Rayna smoothed out the crease Deacon had just created in her shirt. "Nope this was your idea. And we are sticking to it."

He put his head down for a second before lifting it back up, "Fine."

She reached her hand to stroke his jaw, enjoying his 'scruff' as she always called it. She looked into his eyes for a minute before verbalizing her thoughts. "The lawyers called today."

"and?"

"The wait period for a married couple with children is over. So as soon as we get back to Nashville, its time to start hashing out everything."

Deacon asked how she felt about it and she admitted she had no clue, "I can't imagine being in Nashville and not getting to tuck in the girls or see them." Her lip quivered as she tried to stop herself from crying.

"I'm sure you will still see them a ton, way more than when you are on tour. Even when it isn't your time to be with the girls, you can go to Maddie's games and Daphne's dance practices."

She nodded silently, wiping her eyes. "Yeah." She sniffled and admitted he could come too. "Only if you want to though, I don't want to pressure you at all."

Deacon admitted he would like that. "I want to be a bigger part of her life. And Daphne's."

She smiled at the sentiment, "Deacon James Claybourne you are a good man."

Rayna's cell phone started ringing and she grimaced, "Its Teddy."

**The Next Morning**

Deacon took a seat on the floor beside Rayna, handing her a cup of coffee. "So Teddy wants you two to alternate weeks in Belle Meade? So like, you live there with the girls one week and move out and Teddy comes in?"

Rayna nodded and admitted it was a short term solution. "The girls need some stability. And all their friends live in the neighborhood and their school is literally within walking distance."

Deacon asked where she would live on the off weeks.

She shrugged, "I don't know. Tandy offered me one of her extra bedrooms but I am thinking I need some place that is my own."

Deacon opened in his mouth to say something, but Rayna quickly changed the subject, "Actually last night Teddy mentioned something else. He was hoping that the three of us could have a conversation."

Deacon cocked an eyebrow, "The three of us?"

Rayna nodded slowly, "Yeah. He um…he knows that you the truth about Maddie and he wants to…"

"Wants to make sure I remain Uncle Deacon?"

Rayna looked deep into Deacon's eyes, trying to figure out what he was thinking. She pressed her lips together and kept looking at him intently. She finally broke the silence, asking what he wanted.

Deacon let out a soft smile and admitted didn't know, "it all feels really overwhelming right now."

"Overwhelming ?" Rayna asked feeling a sense of dread.

"I feel responsible for Maddie in a way I haven't before. I think about you, about us and it feels so right, it is right. But there are two kids involved now and half the time I feel like I'm still twenty."

Rayna smiled brightly and admitted sometimes she still saw him as twenty too. He laughed huskily causing her to hit him on the leg.

"You know I love you right?"

Deacon's eyes sparkled, "Yeah, I may have had some idea."

**3 nights later**

"You're selling the house in Nashville?" asked Rayna, clearly confused.

Deacon shrugged, "I told you I was selling the house before we came on tour. Remember the fight in the front yard with the sign."

"Yeah I just thought… you hadn't brought it up since the tour started so I just thought you'd changed your mind."

Deacon put his hands in his pockets, clearly nervous. He admitted he was planning on living at the cabin.

"The cabin?"

Deacon looked up at her, "Actually I was thinking you could live at the cabin with me."

Rayna opened her mouth to say something but no words came out. Deacon smiled, "We lived there for years and since the girls are going to be staying at Belle Meade, it isn't like we need more room."

She smiled widely, "Seriously?"

Deacon swallowed again, unsure why it was taking so long for her to say 'yes.' He nodded, "Seriously."

He caught her in mid flight. He grabbed the back of her thighs as she jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist. She kissed him in a series of pecks on the lips, repeating 'yes' between each kiss. She wriggled against him as he maneuvered to sit down on the couch, with her legs still around him. She put both of her hands on his face, stroking his jaw and asked if he was sure. "This is a big step and I know you're trying to sort out everything."

Deacon leaned in to kiss her again, "I'm sure."


	19. Chapter 19

Thanks for all the comments! Y'all are seriously wonderful with all your encouragement!

**Chapter 19 **

**New Orleans**

Rayna moaned as she ate the first bite of warm bread pudding. She offered her next spoonful to Deacon, which he gladly took. The small café was humming with tourists and locals grabbing lunch.

"I love this city," she sighed happily.

Deacon smiled, "I love you seeing you this happy."

She smiled too. In truth, she couldn't remember being this happy. She still had so much on her mind with the girls and Teddy and finishing the album but for the last forty eight hours of the tour, she was determined to enjoy herself. Not that it was overly difficult. New Orleans and Deacon and amazing food with jazz bands playing in the background was close to nirvana for her.

They continued to eat in relative silence, sharing an occasional smile and eating each other's desserts. After their food was gone and they shared another cup of coffee, Deacon suggested they go.

"Go, where?"

Deacon grinned, "I was thinking we could just walk around for a while. I know you are dying to do some shopping in the French Quarter and I'm sure we can catch some decent jazz players near Jackson Square if nowhere else."

She let out a small squeal as she took his hand. He threw money on the table as he happily followed after Rayna.

**The Next Morning **

**3:00 am**

Deacon smiled as the sounds of jazz and drunken college boys yelling at each other filled the air. After the concert, most of the crew and stagehands had gone to Bourbon Street . Although neither had a drop to drink, they were both dizzy with the excitement the area provided. The neon lights and the loud guitars coming from the bars mixed was acting like an aphrodisiac for them both. She pulled him into a long slow kiss in the middle of the street; then, they'd ended up slow dancing at one of the bars for almost an hour.

Now they were back in the hotel room and neither were tired. The two made their way onto their balcony, five floors above the cobbled streets. She giggled, out of nothing but pure happiness, and followed him outside.

"Dance with me," he asked in a low voice.

She rolled her eyes, saying there was no music.

"I think I can take care of that," he assured her. He held out his hand, which she took. She wrapped her arms around him and he leaned close into her. She sighed as his voice whispered into her ear, singing the first few lines of 'I'd Love to Lay You Down.' It was one of his favorite songs and he use to sing it to her all the time before things got bad. Then he would occasionally sing as some kind of apology or as a way to make up for another drunken episode.

But this time it was how he use to sing it to her, sweet and sober and sexy as hell.

Rayna held onto him tighter, neither really moving as he continued to sing into her ear. Her hands traveled up and down his back and shoulders enjoying the feel of his muscles under her touch. His hands cupped her ass as she pressed her body against his.

He moved on to another song, then another. She wasn't sure how long they stayed like that but then she was kissing him and her hands were stroking the front of his jeans. She kicked off her shoes and stepped on his feet as they made their way back into room.

As she fell back against the mattress, he pulled his shirt off his shoulders.

"So we are un-agreeing?"

She sat up, lifting her shirt over her head, "Yes, we are definitely un-agreeing." Deacon undid the button of his jeans which Rayna took as a sign to take off her skirt. While they were both undressing, Rayna smirked, "You so did this on purpose."

Deacon stepped out of his jeans and gave Rayna a sexy smile back, "I don't know what you are talking about." As he leaned over Rayna, she pushed him so he was lying on his back. _He knew exactly what he was doing when he started singing to her. _

**New Orleans-The Next Day**

Deacon shook hands with another roadie, thanking him for a great tour. Juliette was using words like 'glitter gun' and 'extended encore' to describe what tonight's show would be. His eyes searched for Rayna and found her near Liam. She was making fun of a hickey on his neck, pointing it out to several other members of her band. He questioned the wisdom of Rayna's jokes. _Hell, if anybody looked close enough, he had several marks on his neck and chest too. _

He heard Glen announce it was time to run through the last set. Normally he hated the last show. For over a decade, the last show meant he was losing Rayna to Teddy and the country club again, he was losing his routine of sound checks and shows, and he losing playing everyday .

Now, for the first time in over a decade he was excited to head back to Tennessee. It seemed crazy that the bigger, more exciting adventure was back at home now.

**The Hotel Lobby**

Deacon shook the hands of several roadies, wishing them well and promising on the next tour, he'd keep them in mind. As he wondered through the hallway, he ran into several well-wishers and friends who were drinking beer and congratulating themselves on a tour well done.

He made his way into the Lobby itself which was brimming with local media and Edgehill representatives. He spotted Juliette speaking with several guys he recognized as radio deejays and noticed Rayna laughing with a publicist and sevearl VPs from the Label.

The politics of music was never his cup of tea so to speak. But Rayna had always been wonderful at it. He sat down and watched her working the room. He was unsurprised when Liam walked over and took a seat beside him. The two shared small talk for a moment as Liam threw back a double shot of something dark.

Liam cleared his throat before asking what his intentions with Rayna were.

Deacon looked over Liam, surprised by the question and the tone. "My intentions?" _He is acting like I'm some fifteen old punk asking out his daughter._

Liam licked his lips before taking another long swallow. "Look, Rayna and I are almost done with the album. It sounds good, really good and its something we made together."

Deacon slowly responded, unsure of where this was going, "Yeah I know, she's let me listen to the tracks and they sound good."

Liam reclined in his chair, growing more comfortable with whatever this conversation was. "I know she is getting your input on the new artists for her label and all but I want to make sure our album stays our album. Mine and Rayna's."

"Look, I'm not going to interfere with you two and the album but…"

Liam nodded and stood up, "Good. " Deacon watched as Liam walked off wondering what in the hell that was. Before he could find Rayna again, he caught sight of Juliette walking quickly towards him. She pulled his arm and led him to a side room, away from prying eyes.

"You okay?" he asked, knowing she wasn't.

Juliette shook her head, "Its my mom. She left rehab two weeks ago and nobody knows where the hell she is."

"Two weeks ago? Why are you just telling me about it now?"

Juliette nodded, "Because I found out exactly twenty minutes ago myself. And exactly ten minutes ago, I fired Glen for not telling me before now. He said he did it for my own good."

Deacon asked what else Juliette knew.

"Nothing. Just that she left." He watched Juleitte's unaffected expression shift, "she has no money and no where to stay."

He sighed and asked what he could do.

She shrugged, "I don't think she went back to Alabama. There's nothing for her there. Glen says he had somebody looking for her but didn't find anything."

Before they could continue, Rayna interpreted by clearing her throat. "Hey you two, Buck says the pilot called and the plane is ready."

Juliette put on a brave face and excused herself to use the bathroom. Rayna asked what was wrong. Deacon shook his head, "Um, I'll explain on the plane about that."

Rayna wrapped one arm around his waist as they made their way into the Main Lobby. She absently asked him what he and Liam were talking about a few minutes prior. "You had a really weird look on your face."

Deacon sighed, "Oh that was Liam peeing all of your album."'

She stopped walking and threw him a confused look.

"I'll explain on the car ride."


	20. Chapter 20

**As always, thank you all for the wonderful comments!**

**Chapter 19**

**Dulen, Parker & Miller Law Firm**

**1 Week Later**

"You and Deacon are living together now,?" Teddy asked, his voice clearly irritated and louder than his usual decibel.

Rayna rubbed her neck, her body tired from another three hour meeting with Teddy and their respective lawyers.

"Teddy, listen…"

Instead of listening, her ex just walked away and headed back into the conference room. Things had been at a stand-still for a while. They'd each keep their cars. They'd split the checking accounts and the 401Ks. She and would claim the girls as dependents on odd years, him on even. Those were the easy things.

Now that they'd moved on to the house and custody, things had gotten much harder. Then Teddy noticed her new address on several documents he'd clinched his jaw and walked out and now they were at a complete stop.

**The Cabin**

Rayna walked into the cabin, noticing the small pieces of wood near the steps and the pile of wood shavings near the end of the porch. She walked into the living room, her steps following a loud, consistent clanging of a hammer. She kicked off her shoes and threw her pocketbook down, surprised to find Deacon in the spare room and more surprised to find the room very different than she'd ever seen it.

"What is this?" she asked as she took in the intricate shelves that had were placed along the far wall. Deacon turned around with a hammer in his hand. He smiled holding his hands up in the air as to display his work. "You gotta a lot of clothes and stuff. Even more than you had back when you use to live here, so..."

"So you built me a closet?"

He gave her a shy smile, clearly hoping she would like it. She broke into a wide smile as continued to stare at his woodwork, "It is amazing. You built me shelves for my shoes and my dresses?" He pointed out several other features of the closet: the small shelves for her pocket books and the drawers for her sweaters.

She leaned over him and wrapped her arms around him from behind. She left him a kiss behind his ear, nibbling on his neck for a moment. He ran his own hand up and down her arm. She whispered, "I love you."

He turned around gave her a proper hello kiss. He whispered he missed her between kisses. He broke away and asked how she was doing. Rayna pressed her lips together for a thoughtful moment.

"Leaving the girls this morning was bad, but I told them we'd see them tomorrow at Maddie's game."

"I meant with the mediation and Teddy. You sounded tired on the phone."

She relaxed in his arms and asked how his writing session with Juliette went. His eyes lit up, "good. Really good actually. Now quite changing the subject."

"He flipped out a lot when he realized you and I are moving in together."

"How bad?"

Rayna laughed, "It was bad. And he brought up us having a talk about the girls again."

"Yeah, well he shot me looks all through the last game so I can only imagine how much fun this talk will be.."

**The Next Day**

Rayna smiled as Daphne ran up to her. She smiled as the six year old hugged her legs and then squealed in a greeting to Deacon. He hugged her quickly and asked if "Tyson was around?"

The girl blushed as Rayna pulled her hair out of the crooked ponytail and put it back up quickly with the hair tie and ribbon. She stood straight and whispered loudly that he was, "over at the end of the bleachers."

Deacon stood up and let Daphne guide them to the far set of bleachers. They smiled politely and said a quick 'hey' to Teddy and Peggy Kenter who were seated in a middle section. Daphne quickly led them over to sit close to Tyson and his family.

Deacon was was surprised at how angry he got when one of the other girl missed the ball and kicked Maddie in the shin. Then there was the elation of watching Maddie do well. It was crazy how nervous he got when she had the ball or was going after a defensive move.

As a time out was called, his eyes darted over to see Daphne and Tyson and several other kids kicking around a soccer ball off in the distance. It was then he spotted the two camera guys in near the tree line. He inwardly groaned. Of course, the paparazzi had left them alone for a few weeks but that was apparently short lived. He looked over at Rayna, knowing she hadn't spotted them yet. _I'll just let them enjoy this for today and worry about the story tomorrow._

**3 days later**

**Belle Meade**

Rayna grimaced as Teddy's voice got louder and angrier. Deacon's was downright hostile. Rayna looked out the window, making sure that Tandy hadn't returned with the girls.

"Are you kiddin' me?," she heard Deacon ask before turning her attention back to the two men who looked ready to punch each other.

Rayna frowned and told them both to calm down. "Teddy, you keep saying you want us to talk and all you are doing is yelling."

"Well excuse me Rayna. It just is upsetting that I once again read that Deacon is the father of both of my daughters. Seems a little suspicious to me that the stories keep popping up."

Rayna rolled her eyes, "Look we all agreed that right now we wouldn't tell Maddie the truth. Deacon loves the girls and wouldn't want Maddie to find out like this."

Teddy seemed to calm down a bit but Deacon still looked ready to punch him. Teddy admitted he wanted to set ground rules. Rayna nodded, "I agree."

Teddy put his hands in his pockets. "I don't want Deacon to spend the night here."

Deacon spoke before Rayna could. "I wouldn't confuse the girls like that, 'sides I hate this house." Rayna cocked her head in a sympathetic gaze to Deacon. Teddy nodded, "but I'm okay with Deacon being over some during the day."

Rayna nodded and thanked Teddy. She offered Peggy the same which Teddy nodded and thanked her for it. Teddy asked that neither bring up the criminal case against him with the girls and Rayna nodded, "We agreed that we'd talk to the girls about it together when something happens."

All three turned to see Tandy's car pull up in the driveway with their book bags in tow.

**7 hours later**

Deacon leaned in for a quick kiss, whispering he'd miss her tonight. She smiled against his lips and leaned in again, not wanting to break contact. He asked if she was coming to the studio tomorrow. She nodded, "Yep. I told Juliette I would be there for her latest show down with Marshall."

They kissed again but drew apart when they heard "ewwwwww" coming from the stairs. They broke apart and looked towards Daphne, who was standing on the stairs with a disgusted look on her face.

Rayna blushed, "Hey baby. We didn't know you were there."

Daphne frowned, "Why do adults kiss, it is so gross?" As Deacon tried to find the right words, Daphne continued, "Yesterday at school Tyson kissed me twice and it was so yucky. It was like he was spitting on me." Rayna's red checks turned white while Deacon's eyes widened.

"And on that note, I will you beautiful ladies tomorrow."


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

**Thanks for all the continued support and comments. Excited about the new promo(s) for the next couple of episodes, just ready for to be off hiatus again!**

Deacon groaned as sunlight filtered through the blinds. He could hear Rayna's voice floating through the air in an unfamiliar song. He rubbed his eyes quickly and sat up, still disoriented from waking up. He brushed his teeth quickly, knowing she would complain if he didn't.

He smelt coffee and cinnamon from the kitchen a second before spotting her leaning over the oven pulling something out. He called her name, causing her to turn around and smile. She walked quickly towards him, wrapping his arms around his neck and bringing him for a kiss.

He moaned at the sweet taste melted sugar in her mouth. She pulled her lips away telling him good morning.

"What are you doing here?" he asked happily, while her hands traced over his bare chest. _It was in the middle of her week with the girls and while they normally saw each other during the day, she normally didn't come to the cabin._

Rayna smiled, "Marshall called me when I was dropping the girls off from school. He told me that you and Juliette didn't leave the studio til after 4 this morning. Figured you'd be asleep til at least noon and then I know you two are heading back there at 5. And I wanted to see you today."

Deacon smiled to her, grateful he didn't have to do another day without physically seeing her. She busied herself with pulling plates out of the cabinet while they caught up. Teddy was being a particular pain in the ass in the last few days. "He called to tell the girls goodnight last night and practically bit my head off. It was just weird considering how cordial we've managed to be lately."

"Any idea why?"

"I know he had a few meeting with his lawyer about the court case. And I know tomorrow he's supposed to have some closed session with the city council. They all think he should resign. Maybe he's just worried about that?"

Deacon leaned in closely as she sat the glasses down. "Okay I get you for all of three hours before you have to go pick up the girls from school. Enough talking about Teddy."

She gave him a coy smile while her eyes turning a deeper shade of blue. "What did you want to do instead?"

He smiled and leaned in for a longer kiss while his hands came up to cup her face. In between kisses, she told him she made breakfast. He pulled back and gave her a look that nearly made Rayna's knees buckle. He whispered "later" causing her to laugh.

**45 minutes later**

Deacon ate another bite of the sticky cinnamon bun from Rayna's hand then watched as she put a piece into her own mouth. She sighed in contentment as he took the pads of her finger and licked each one clean of the sugar that still remained on them.

"So tonight you and Juliette are going to finish recording that song you played me last night over the phone?"

Deacon made a confirmation with a moan while his tongue swirled around Rayna's finger. "And then tomorrow morning, Liam and I are going are meeting with Buck and Marshall and the two Vice Presidents. We are doing a straight-through listening."

Deacon's tongue stopped its movement and his eyes flashed with something between regret and hurt. She ran her fingertips along his jaw and made him look at her, "What's wrong?"

Deacon looked at her for a moment, "Nothing really, it just hit me that you've never done a straight-through without me before." She bit her lip to stop smiling. He sounded like a little boy who couldn't have his ice cream.

"You can come if you want."

"It just feels so weird that you're making this record and I don't have any part of it."

Rayna swallowed harshly and brushed her hair out her face. She whispered against his neck that most of the record was about him.

**3 days later**

Deacon grimaced as the playback ended. _It sounded unfinished, undone somehow. _But the producer liked it and so did Marshall. Juliette seemed satisfied with it. Glen seemed preoccupied. But it wasn't right, yet. Close but not there. He looked down at his cell phone, smiling when he read the latest text from Ray.

"_Seriously, I'm naked. Where are you? " _She'd sent that over an hour ago. He rubbed his eyes, suggesting they figure out the rest in the morning. The group quickly packed up their bags and headed for the small parking lot. As he jumped into the SVU, he pulled out his cell and hit call.

"Hey," he smiled.

Her voice sounded strained as she softly said "hey" back. He asked what was wrong but instead he just got silence. She sniffled into the phone and promised she was okay and so were the girls. Deacon turned onto the highway, and squeezed the steering wheel.

"Ray you're scaring me."

He heard her gasp, trying to catch her breath. "Its Teddy. He um…he called a few minutes ago and he's taking the deal. He's going to prison. "

**45 minutes later**

Deacon walked into the cabin, unsurprised to see Rayna in her shorts and t-shirt pacing near the fireplace. Her hair was pulled up in a pile and she'd been crying.

The second she saw him she started crying. _She'd always done that. It use to bother him, at the beginning of the relationship. She'd be fine, holding everything together, and then she'd see him and burst into tears. _But over time, he'd realized it was only with him that she could really put her guard down around.

Her body shook as he placed his arms around her back and just let her cry. In between hiccups and cries, he gathered most of the information. Teddy would get a minimum of five months in jail and then put on probation after that. The plea was scheduled for two weeks from yesterday. They were telling the girls this weekend. He slowly backed up to sit down on the couch, gathering Rayna in his lap and she continued to cry.

**3 days later**

Rayna listened to the door slam upstairs. She was relieved that Daphne had finally gotten angry and stormed away. Maddie had run off nearly an hour ago. But Daphne just kept asking questions: would Daddy wear handcuffs? would he wear stripe suits like those guys did in jail? Would he live in a cell with murders? Did he kill someone too? Is that why they were getting a divorce? Was Mama going to prison next? _The questions were non-stop. _Then Teddy claimed nothing would change and Daphne yelled at him that he was lying.

She looked at Teddy who was visibly falling apart. He turned around to head upstairs but Rayna told him to stop.

"Not now, Rayna."

"Then when?" she scoffed, "You are going to prison in 10 days. We need to talk about this. We've got plans to make."

Teddy yelled loudly, "Oh is this where you tell me that you want Deacon to move in here?"

Rayna put her hand on her hip, annoyed this was where the conversation was going. "I think we need to talk about bringing the girls to the jail because you keep acting like it's going to happen. You are acting like the girls are going to visit a museum. Teddy we are talking about taking them to a federal prison for visits and I'm not really comfortable…

Teddy yelled back, "Are you kidding me? It is a family visitation, once a week, and I'm not living without seeing them for six damn months."

Rayna reared back, "You made decision after decision that affects this family. You stole money. You lied to me and to the bank for months. Now our daughters are suffering because of your ego was bruised."

The next minutes were a blur of hurtful accusations and raised voices on both sides. She warned him not to bring Deacon into this. He made a snide remark about Deacon about being in the middle. Then for a few minutes, he focused on her career and how unimportant she made him feel. She yelled back, "there is no way you are blaming me for this. You did this. You did this to all of us."

The conversation wrapped around itself several times until the Mansion came up again. "You wanted to keep the house for a temporary solution to trade weekends, but obviously that isn't happening now."

Teddy slammed down the beer down causing the glass to clang against the marble countertop, "Oh here we go. So what? Either you want to sell our home or perhaps you want Deacon and Maddie to spend the next six months having a father-daughter bonding session?"

"You are unbelievable! Deacon has played by your rules since he found out the truth."

Teddy laughed sarcastically and far louder than necessary. "God, you always defend him, don't you? Newsflash Rayna he would have been a shitty father to Maddie and a worse husband back then and guess what, he hasn't changed. No matter how much you two pretend like you're happy right now, you will regret this."

Rayna rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to speak but instead she caught site of both her daughters standing at the edge of the kitchen. Maddie's eyes were wide while Daphne's were swimming in tears.

**45 minutes later**

Deacon grabbed his phone, hearing the ring. He answered with a "hey, how bad was that?"

Instead of hearing Rayna's voice he heard Teddy's voice, guarded and short. "Deacon, can you come over to the house?"

He asked if Rayna was okay. "Physically, everybody's fine but you should get over here now."


	22. Chapter 22

**Thank you all for the comments. They are incredibly encouraging!**

**Chapter 22**

**Belle Meade**

Deacon walked through the backdoor and took in Teddy's appearance. His shoulders were hunched and his eyes carried a blank stare. He looked lost for lack of a better word. _He was facing_ p_rison for six months, divorcing his wife, having her move on with her ex, all while the media documented every word. _

Deacon walked slowly into the kitchen, unsure of the situation and still uncomfortable in Teddy's house, especially with Teddy standing right there.

Deacon asked where Rayna was. The other man answered back that she was upstairs with Maddie but didn't invite Deacon to go upstairs. Deacon nodded as if that was an answer to all his questions and took a seat at the bar. Teddy opened the fridge and uncapped a beer. The silence engulfed the two before Teddy offered that Daphne was upstairs packing.

Deacon furrowed his brow. _Packing for what? _ Surely Teddy would want to the girls to spend as much time with him as possible until he went to jail. A moment later, Teddy walked out of the kitchen without a word.

Deacon sat there at the kitchen bar looking around for a moment before he saw a mop of blonde hair walking with a small pink suitcase rolling behind her. Her face looked concerned and she sniffled to stop herself from crying. _Just like Ray does. _

He smiled and greeted Daphne warmly. In response, the little girl frowned. _Seriously what in the hell is going on?_

The little girl bit her lip and seemed to have some kind of internal struggle before walking over to him. Daphne's eyes were curios as she asked if Maddie was going to go live with him. Deacon looked at her for a moment, not really sure what she meant.

Then her eyes widened, as though she'd come to some kind of realization. "So are you my Daddy too?"

Before Deacon could answer back he caught a flash of dark hair running through across the threshold. As the door slam loudly behind Maddie, he heard Rayna yelling Maddie's name.

**2 Hours Later**

**The Living Room**

"GEEEE TEDDY I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE BECAUSE THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!," shouted Deacon.

Teddy yelled back calling Deacon several names before Tandy shouted for them both to "shut up." Both men took a deep breath as Tandy reminded them that right now they needed to "find out where Maddie went and be there for her."

Deacon looked over at Rayna who was standing at the window, staring out into the black night. He walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing his chest against her back. She instinctively leaned back against him while her arms rested on top of his. _He'd felt a bit uncomfortable holding her like this, with Teddy thirty feet away but Ray needed him. _He whispered into her ear that they'd find Maddie soon. Rayna's voice was deep from crying when she answered back. "Wow I'm some kind of mother. I keep calling the police because my daughter keeps running away."

Deacon held on tighter for a moment before Tandy yelled, "She's at Daddy's. He's got her." Rayna let out a relived cry but Deacon somehow felt worse. _God Lamar hates me. The Maddie would rather be with Lamar than Ray or Teddy or Tandy or me is….terrifying._

**Lamar's House**

**The Next Morning**

Deacon thanked Lamar for opening the door and walked inside. He fought the urge to throw up as Lamar led him towards one of the sitting rooms. _If there was one house he hated more than Teddy's, it was Lamar's. The house was stuffy and seemingly unlived in. Every piece of furniture, every picture, and every plaque, were placed to show off the Wyatt's wealth and power. _Lamar gestured up the main stairwell, "She's in Rayna's old room. I trust you remember it."

Deacon swallowed harshly. _How the hell did he know about that? He'd never gone upstairs when Lamar was home. Wait why am I worried about sex that happened like two decades ago? _He met Lamar's gaze for a second before slowly turning and walking up the stairs. He took two stairs at a time only slowing down when he approached the third door on the left. He knocked softly, the louder. He pushed the door open when Maddie said "come in."

"Hi," Deacon said weakly. Maddie was sitting at the bay window clutching a pillow that matched the bedspread. _Okay, you got the door open. Now_ w_hat the hell do I say?_

Maddie's expression did not change but her lips curved upwards as though she was trying to smile but it didn't reach her eyes. He walked over to the bed and sat down, facing Maddie. He asked how she was doing and she shrugged, not bothering to respond.

An odd silence filled the room as Maddie looked down at her pillow and Deacon looked down at his shoes. Neither knew exactly what to say.

Maddie broke the silence, "Mom told me last night that you didn't know about me til a while ago. But how is that even possible?"

Deacon felt his head swim. _This feels like an out of body experience. I find out I have a teenage daughter and the first conversation we have about It involves talking about sex with her mother. Sex that I can't remember. _

Deacon let out a deep breath. _The truth, okay the censored truth is best. "_Your mom and I were together for a long time."

Maddie seemed unimpressed, "Yeah I know. You two were boyfriend and girlfriend for as long as my dad and my mom have been married."

"Um yeah….But the last few years of our relationship were hard."

Maddie let her grip on the pillow go as she met his eye, "Because you couldn't stop drinking?" Her words had a slight edge to them. _She's baiting me, testing me._

"Yes. How do you know about that?"

Maddie raised an eyebrow, "It's in the papers. And Grandpa sometimes calls you Mom's drunken guitar player." _God I should have let Rayna just run over Lamar in his driveway that time when he nearly ruined that gig. _

"Okay. Well back when you were…um…conceived. Your Mom and I weren't living together anymore. We'd broken up and she was living with your Aunt Tandy. But…."

Maddie interrupted, "So you two lived together without being married?"

Deacon stopped mid-thought. _Damn, I really just walked into that one didn't I? _ "Well we'd broken up. But adult relationships are complicated and…your mother and I still loved each other very much."

"Not enough to stay together."

Deacon exhaled loudly. _This conversation is going even worse than I thought possible. Ray warned me but I knew I could handle this. Yep… _"So we um… we ….we were together but I was drinking and sometimes when I drink I black out or..ummm have trouble remembering what happened."Maddie's eyes flashed with anger like Rayna's did. _That's something I've never noticed before._

"So for all you know she's lying about you being my father? I mean maybe she slept with another guy too."

Deacon couldn't stop his jaw tightening. Maddie must have noticed his reaction because then she smirked. "You know the tabloids said she had sex with Liam too? I bet she did. I bet I'm not even your daughter."

Deacon heard his voice before realizing he was speaking. "You are not going to talk about your Mother like that."

Maddie seemed taken aback and her slumped over, clutching her pillow again.

Deacon took it as opportunity, "Maddie, I know right now you are scared and confused. You feel like everybody you trust and love has lied to you. I know how you feel…." Maddie looked up, clearly ready to keep fighting but Deacon continued. "Maddie, when I found out you were my daughter, I felt the same thing." He watched as her fingers traced the seam of the pillow.

"In my life, I've trusted and loved two people that weren't my kin. Your mom and Coleman. And they both knew about you and me and didn't tell me."

"Coleman knows?"

Deacon nodded, "He um…figured it out. He didn't tell me or your Mom or anybody else he knew."

Maddie asked who else knew. _Okay this kind of conversation I can deal with. _"Your Grandpa, Tandy, Your parents, Coleman, and I told a friend of mine."

"What friend?"

"Juliette." Maddie's eyes grew wide. _Is she actually excited about that? _

**The Cabin **

6 hours later

Deacon fell down on the couch completely exhausted as Rayna sat beside him. She was wearing a pair of shorts and one of his t-shirts and had managed to smile as Deacon went on and on.

"Then she asked why we didn't get married."

Rayna's eyes sparkled, "And what did you tell her?"

"That I was stupid and didn't propose to you properly. She asked a lot of what-if questions and she apparently had no idea why you named her Maddie."

Rayna smiled as she rested her head on his shoulder and snuggled closer into Deacon's body. "So you told her?"

Deacon nodded and apologized, hoping she wasn't mad about that. Rayna smiled, "No not at all, that is weird though, I guess I just thought she knew. My mom use to read me those books all the time. And then I had all the Madeline books when she was little, I use to read them to her. I still have them somewhere in a box."

Deacon smiled, "I told her that you'd always planned on naming your first daughter Madeline and if you ever had a son, you would name him Wyatt."

Rayna smacked him with a "ha ha." Deacon grinned and admitted Maddie thought that was funny too. Rayna watched as Deacon's eyes lit up talking about their daughter. _Their daughter_. Eventually Deacon admitted that although he made some headway, she still seemed furious at both she and Teddy.

Rayna nodded, "Yeah, I talked to Tandy on the phone earlier and Maddie refused to come to the phone. Tandy said Teddy stopped by but Maddie refused to see him."

"I'm sorry."

Rayna shrugged, "I did this to myself. I lied to you and I lied to her and now I just have to hope she'll forgive me soon."

Deacon asked how Daphne was. Rayna sighed, "Confused. But Teddy and she were going to order out Chinese food and talk. It will be good for both of them."

He wrapped his arm tighter around her and whispered that he loved her. She repeated the sentiment and kissed him before snuggling in closer.

**4 days later**

Her daughter screamed out, asking why she should listen to her. "ALL YOU DO IS LIE TO ME AND I HATE YOU!"

Rayna pressed her lips together, trying to choose her words carefully. "Maddie I know right now you are angry and hurt and confused and scared but I need you to know that I love you, and your father loves you and Deacon loves you."

The little girl called her mother a 'bitch' again before screaming that she hated her over and over again. As Rayna watched her daughter run up the stairs, she heard her father's voice.

"Give her time Rayna. She's got your stubbornness and has inherited Deacon's propensity for her use of foul language and acting without thinking." Rayna turned around and gave her father a warning look. "Daddy, you are doing me a favor by making sure Maddie is safe here but don't overstep and put ideas in Maddie's head about Deacon or Teddy or me."

Lamar put his hands up in mock surrender. "I am not interfering but you should know the next few days I'm going to busy."

"Doing what?" Rayna asked suspiciously. Lamar gave a wide smile, the kind that made Rayna nervous.

"Teddy is doing the good and proper thing and turning in his official resignation during tomorrow's nights closed council meeting."

"I see," answered Rayna. "And who are you planning on putting forward as your suggested nominee?"

Lamar grinned, "Darlin' you should know me better than this by now. I don't make suggestions. I make the rules."

Rayna stifled an annoyed groan. _No matter what else changes, he doesn't. As frustrating and horrible as he could be, it was oddly comforting. Daddy would never change._

As her thoughts drifted to Teddy resigning his mayoral position, her cell phone rang. She smiled when she saw it was Deacon.

"Hey," she greeted in a soft voice. She could tell something was wrong the way Deacon said 'hey' back. Rayna asked what was going.

"It's Jolene."

"Juliette's mom?"

"Yeah, its an overdose and it isn't good."


	23. Chapter 23

**Thank you for all the wonderful comments. This is the next to last chapter. I must say, I am still BEYOND NOT OVER the last episode! Our babies were perfection!  
**

**Chapter 23**

**The Cabin**

Rayna watched as Deacon tried to loop his tie. His hand fumbled with the material, causing Rayna to drop her purse and help him.

She focused on straightening tie before looking up at his face. His beautiful eyes were swimming with tears and his face showed how tired he was. She let her palm cup his jaw, causing him to lean into her touch.

"I love you," she whispered. His mouth turned toward her hand, kissing her fingers before sighing deeply. Rayna whispered that they better go, "We told Juliette we'd be there by 10 and it is already 9:15."

He nodded and grabbed his black jacket.

**Lamar's Home**

Rayna looked up at the ceiling in frustration as Maddie bounded up the steps again. _At least there was no name calling or cussing this time. _But Maddie was still so confused and mad. And with Teddy going to prison in three days, it would probably get worse.

**Belle Meade**

"So can you take anything with you?"

Teddy shrugged, swallowing another large sip of beer. "Pictures and toiletries mainly. There is a cantina for drinks and snacks."

Rayna asked if he needed any money but Teddy grimaced, "I can afford Pepsi and candy bars."

"What about books or other stuff to do?"

Teddy guzzled the rest of his bottle, "There is a library and if I'm lucky a cross-stitch class."

Rayna pressed her lips together in frustration, knowing he was just venting and scared. Rayna asked where Peggy was but Teddy changed the subject. _Okay. _Rayna breathed in deeply, knowing they couldn't avoid this conversation anymore.

"We need to talk about what is going to happen in the next six months."

Teddy jerked open his fridge and opened another beer. His tone was biting but he said "fine."

**2 days later-The Cabin **

Deacon inhaled with a shaky breath as Rayna kissed his neck trying to calm her own breathing down. A few kisses later and Rayna laid down on top of him.

"Ray, that was…."

She smiled, always loving when he lost control like that. "I couldn't help it, I missed you and you were so sexy just laying there."

He grinned widely, then frowned realizing they couldn't stay like this. She saw his face and knew what he was thinking. "Shower before you go over to Juliette's?"

Deacon nodded, jumping out of bed and grabbing her hand.

**Juliette's House-1 week Later**

Deacon took in the sight of Juliette, wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. Her face was swollen from all the crying she'd done but she still managed to look thinner. With no inflection in her voice she recounted the trip to the courthouse. "It took over two hours to close the estate of a woman who didn't own a dollar."

Deacon asked what she was planning on doing for the rest of the day. She shrugged, walking past several sympathy arrangements that had been sent. Deacon put his hands in his pockets and asked if she wanted to try and write. She gave him a thoughtful look and said "no thank you."

"Juliette you haven't left the house in seven days except to go to the courthouse."

Juliette looked out the window, failing to acknowledge he spoke.

Deacon gave her a minute before speaking again, "Rayna wanted to know if you wanted to go to Belle Meade tonight to have dinner."

"What?" Juliette asked, her head turning around.

Deacon couldn't stop himself from smiling at Juliette's surprised face. "Teddy's in prison and Maddie is still furious at Ray. Maddie's still staying with good ole Lamar but we are having dinner tonight with both girls….And, well you might be a way to avoid a thirteen year old storming off before we eat the first bite."

Juliette cocked her head to the side. "So the plan is to make me feel like I'm being useful and helpful to distract me from my mom dying?"

Deacon shrugged. "It is lasagna. And it is actually good."

**Belle Meade-6 hours later**

Juliette smiled at Deacon and Maddie played their guitars and wrote a song about Daphne's science project which she and Rayna were helping the little girl with.

Rayna rolled her eyes playfully as Deacon sang that,

"Mars is red and Venus is green,

Jupiter has an eye and Saturn has rings."

Daphne laughed and clapped her hands before Rayna warned it was time for Daphne to string Neptune to the board so it would have time to dry.

**2 hours later**

Rayna walked into the kitchen surprised to see Juliette still there, sitting on a barstool. Juliette wiped the few tears that had spilled down her cheek s and asked if the girls were asleep.

"Daphne is. Maddie is still pouting over the fact she has to stay here tonight."

Juliette choked a sob. "Does she have any idea how lucky she is," Rayna pulled up a barstool beside Juliette and gave a knowing look.

"She's thirteen and she has realized that her parents aren't perfect."

She sniffled, "I never thought either one of mine were anything but horrible growing up."

Rayna titled her head to the side. "You know when my mama died, I went through years of not knowing how to deal with it."

Juliette nodded, "I'm sure it was a shock."

Rayna raised an eyebrow, "For any twelve year old, losing a parent is a shock. But yeah it was a car accident."

Juliette sniffled, "I've known this is how it was going to end for a long time. I just figured that she'd be with some drug dealer in Alabama and I'd find out about it three days later."

Rayna shook her head, "Knowing an overdose was a possibly isn't the same as knowing for sure it would happen. You are allowed to be shocked, that doesn't make you stupid or naïve."

Juliette looked out the window onto the front yard, letting silence fill the air. A moment later Juliette turned back to Rayna, "Why didn't she love me more than she loved those damn pills."

"Listen to me, this is not your fault." But Rayna's words fell on deaf ears as the younger girl broke into an uncontrolled sob."

**1 week later**

**Belle Meade**

Deacon sat at the window while Rayna sat on the bed with Maddie. Maddie looked at them both in disbelief.

"So I don't have a choice then?"

Rayna flipped her hair behind her shoulder. "Maddie you are thirteen years old. And your father, and Deacon and I have all spoken. We think it is better for you to come home."

The girl crossed her arms in front of her and threatened to run away if they made her go back to the Mansion.

Deacon spoke up, "Maddie, would you please quit threatening to run away or actually running away. It scares the hell out of all of us."

Maddie's gaze turned to Deacon and she gave an apologetic "sorry."

Rayna reached out to brush Maddie's hair out of her face. "Baby, I know you are mad at me and you are confused but honey you belong at home, not with your Grandfather."

Maddie looked at them both. "I don't really have a choice right?"

Rayna looked at her for a moment, "Honey, we've let you stay here because we know how much you are hurting and we knew you needed some time apart but it's time for you to come back home."

Maddie stayed silent for a moment and then turned to Deacon, asking him if he was going to stay at the Mansion too. Deacon shrugged, "Maddie that isn't really my house. That is the house your mother and your father had. And I agreed I wouldn't move in or stay there at night."

Maddie read through his words, "You hate the house 'cause Dad lived there. You wouldn't want to live there even if you could."

Deacon admitted that hate was a strong word. Hell, he'd used that word a lot to describe the house, so it wasn't completely inappropriate. "I just never saw your Mom wanting to live in a house that big or in Belle Meade. And when she did, it felt like she was rejecting me."

Maddie gave him a confused look, "but she was already married and I was like two when she moved here."

Rayna took over, "Baby, do you know how you feel about your Father and I being different people than you thought we were?"

Maddie rolled her eyes, "You mean like finding out Daddy was a criminal?"

Rayna exhaled loudly, "Um… sure. Okay. Well Deacon thought me moving into that house was a symbol of me being something other than the person he knew."

"Okay here is the deal. You are moving back home. But if you need some space, you are still welcome to come over to your Grandfather's house."

Maddie looked over at Deacon, "Why can't I go live at your house?"

**Belle Meade-2 Weeks Later**

Rayna hugged her sister, "Are you sure about this? You are Madam Mayor now and I think you have better things to do than babysit."

Tandy took her hand up, "Oh please. They are my nieces and I love them. Besides Juliette Barnes is doing the heavy lifting: dinner and taking them to the movies. I just have to make sure they get into bed before midnight."

She smiled, "thank you! Deacon and I are in serious need of a night away. He's still helping Juliette out, and he's been here for the girls and me. He's also trying to put some polish on Juliette's album and trying to be supportive of me while I finish mine."

Tandy smiled, "He has been amazing through all of this."

Rayna shot by a wide grin, "He really has and tonight I plan to show him how….grateful I am."

**The Cabin **

Deacon continued to fist Rayna's hair in his fist while his head rested against the back of the couch. He breathed out her name several times. Rayna rocked back on her heels, loving seeing him out of control like this.

She smirked and stood up. "Okay I am going to start dinner. When you fully recover, zip up your pants and meet me in the kitchen." She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek before bouncing off to the kitchen, humming to herself.

**The Next Day**

Rayna smiled as Deacon lit several candles around the kitchen. The radio was on an AM station playing country music from the 70s. She gave him a taste of the chicken, placing the fork up to his lips. He gave her thumbs up and a quick kiss to show his approval.

The two ate in relative silence off of one plate, something they use to do all the time. They danced to songs they hadn't heard in years. He spun her around while she hummed older songs. Rayna laughed as Deacon dipped her so her hair glided over the floor. They eventually turned off the radio, instead preferring for Deacon to play some of their old songs, strumming the familiar cords in a lazy fashion.

Eventually the two made their way upstairs, hand in hand.

**Belle Meade **

Rayna smiled as she unpacked the groceries, filling Tandy in on the details. Her sister gasped at several of the more explicit details before Rayna admitted there was something else.

Tandy asked what else happened.

"Deacon thinks we should get married at the Cabin."

Tandy's eyes lit up and grew wide. Her mouth opened wide as she grabbed Rayna's hand. Finding nothing on either hand, Tandy shot her sister a questioning look.

Rayna shrugged, "No proposal or anything. Just something he casually said while we were fishing this morning. He said it in between pass the bait and asking what time my meeting with Marshall was."

"You went fishing?"

Rayna rolled her eyes, "I was not fishing; Deacon was. But I think, I think he is planning to propose soon."

Tandy turned serious. "Rayna, I know the paperwork is almost done between you and Teddy but are you sure about this?"

Rayna smiled widely. "I've been waiting for Deacon to ask me to marry him since I was like 21 but we aren't in some big hurry. I mean the girls need some stability and I don't want to be one of those women who get married the day their divorce is final."

Tandy smirked, "Just don't make me wear something hideous like a big yellow dress with bows."

**The Country Kitchen**

"So it just came out?" asked Coleman as he laughed before taking a gulp of coffee.

Deacon shrugged, "Yep. I mean it isn't like we've never talked about it before."

Coleman reminded Deacon that those conversations happened a long time ago, while Deacon was still drinking, "before there were kids and divorces and sobriety to deal with."

Deacon laughed, "Look, she's not ready. I mean she is but the girls aren't so that means she's not."

Coleman turned to a more serious matter, asking how he was dealing with Jolene's death. Deacon looked out the window. "She wasn't nearly as bad as I was. I mean I remember my really dark days being so much worse than hers. "

"And you are wondering why you are still here and she isn't."

"I just thought I could help her, I thought I was helping her. And then she's just gone, like Vinny."

**Belle Meade**

Rayna kissed Deacon, "You are a good man Mr. Claybourne."

Deacon smiled, "So are we going to talk about what I said this morning?"

"Nope, we aren't talking about you proposing to me."

Deacon gave her a bemused expression, "Right and we aren't talking about it because?"

"Because...you aren't going to propose yet and no offense but we've talked about it before." Deacon swallowed, knowing that he'd often talked about marriage before but never followed through with the actual ring or the proposal.

He waited until she took a big gulp of water before nonchalantly admitting he had the bought the ring. He grinned as she chocked on the water and looked at him with her blue eyes brightly shinning. He walked over to where she was standing and kissed her quickly.

He smiled against her lips, "I love you. And you better say yes."

She kissed him deeper, enjoying the taste of him for a moment, "Then I guess you better make sure to do it up right."


	24. Chapter 24

**CHAPTER 24**

**Okay here is the last chapter. First and foremost thank you so much for all the comments/reviews/PMs and follows. They were all so appreciated and truly encouraging. I am working on another story right now, a little different than this one. I think tomorrow's finale will probably rip our hearts out based on the preview but that is what fanfiction during the summer is for :) .**

**Thanks again for all the amazingness you are! And I hope for all of the other writers I hope you continue writing too!**

**4 Months Later**

Music Row Burgers & Fries

Deacon ate another French fry and smiled widely as Coleman asked how everybody was doing.

"Good," was his simple reply but his face showed things were much better than 'good.' Deacon filled Coleman in on the latest happenings. Rayna's divorce had been finalized almost two months ago, and last week they'd finally finished the property division.

Maddie and Daphne had spent most of the summer at various day camps and playing softball. Rayna's album had a release date of September; Juliette's was being released in November. . He'd done some playing as backup to several of Scarlett and Gunner's songs as well. He had written quite a bit as well but for the first time since before he met Rayna he'd had time just to write for the sake of writing. Some days he'd end up with nothing and other days he write four or five songs.

Coleman laughed when Deacon brought up Maddie's birthday next week. "It is a boy-girl party. And I'm not allowed to talk to anybody. Neither is Teddy or Rayna or Tandy. Oh and she gets to approve our outfits in advance. Apparently Rayna can't wear anything too mom-ish or anything that shows her boobs."

Coleman let out a bark of laughter as Deacon made a nervous expression. Coleman lifted an eyebrow and asked how Lamar reacted to the other news.

Deacon grinned, "Well I asked him. He said 'hell no'. Told him Rayna had already said 'yes' and he shrugged and asked why I bothered to ask him."

Coleman laughed, "and how is the house hunting going?"

Deacon made an annoyed face. "Well Teddy is demanding the girls live close to school. It honestly it is a good idea but I'd rather live in East Nashville. Every house we've looked at so far either reminds me of Lamar Wyatt or it has too much or not enough of something."

"And the cabin isn't feasible?"

"No it is almost an hour away from the girls' school and it is way too far away from the label and the studios. And there are three bedrooms but there really isn't enough room for Rayna's clothes much less two girls…and the um…well the walls are pretty thin."

Coleman laughed again, "So do we have a date yet?"

Deacon smiled, "Nope. Ray wants to wait until after the album is released, she doesn't want to make it feel rushed."

Coleman asked what Deacon wanted.

"I just want to marry her."

**Edgehill Records**

Rayna made an unimpressed face as Marshall continued to go on about her publicity junket. It had gone from a 10 day media blitz to nearly a month long campaign. In addition to the days of media in New York, LA, and Chicago, there were now eight more cities to visit. There were publicity shows in Dallas, Denver, Atlanta, D.C., Boston, St. Louis, Vancouver, Toronto, and of course Nashville. Liam had insisted adding San Francisco and Miami for his own contacts. Then there was the internet chats, the twitter sneak peeks, the radio interviews, and the newspaper sit-downs. It would be mid-October before she had more than a few hours of sleep at night.

Then Deacon would be starting his press tour with Juliette right when hers was winding down. Scarlett and Gunnar were already touring in small venues with her new material and once Juliette's publicity blitz ended, Scarlett and Gunnar's would be starting.

She looked down at her ring, fiddling with it. It was a simple emerald cut ring. Deacon had taken Maddie with him to ring shop and they'd picked the perfect one. She'd been wearing it for nine weeks now and it still made her smile to look down at her finger.

They hadn't set a date yet but at this rate, it would be 2016 before they had a few weeks of downtime. She sighed as she looked back down at her ring. She glanced down at her phone and discreetly sent a text message.

A moment later she saw Juliette's name and message flash up: What do you need me to do?

**2 Days Later**

Oakhill Academy

Rayna yelled at Juliette to hurry up as the two bounded down the halls of the Elementary school. Juliette's heels made a loud clanging sound as she caught up to the red head. She apologized loudly, "That hot guy was a Science teacher." Rayna could hear the jokes about chemistry in her head as the two turned into the auditorium and flung open the large wooden door.

They quickly walked down the aisle until they found Deacon and Maddie sitting in two wooden chairs. They sat down in the seats between them as Tandy, a row back, whispered a disapproving "you're late." She caught Teddy throwing her a look from across the auditorium. Rayna breathed out a sigh of relief as she caught Daphne's dance class walking out onto the stage.

Juliette hissed back to Tandy, "We were running errands. Blame Rayna."

**The Cabin **

Rayna smiled against Deacon's lip as they continued to disagree, "Nope. It is bad luck."

Deacon bit down against her lip, tugging slowly before releasing it again. "It is bad luck to see the dress. I wanna see what you are planning on wearing under the dress." He leaned in again, kissing her hard for a moment before releasing her again with a boyish grin.

Rayna pulled back, "Actually you'd want to see what I'm wearing for the wedding night, but still the answer is no."

He smirked against her lips and kissed her quickly before asking what they were going.

Rayna looked over at Deacon in his jeans and black shirt and smiled. "You look kinda handsome."

Deacon smiled, "Well you picked it out."

He raised an eyebrow when he noticed her blue jean skirt and white blouse with her pink cowboy boots. He asked again where they were going.

"The Macon County Magistrate's office."

Deacon scrunched his nose in confusion before Rayna held up the wedding rings she and Juliette had picked up a few days before.

She smiled, "I know I said I wanted to wait until after things settled down but I just want to marry you. And I want it to just be the two of us when I become your wife." He smiled and asked if she was sure. Her hair fell beside her in waves, "I told the girls today that we were getting married for real tonight and we were having the fake wedding in a few months. They were okay with it so long as Maddie still gets to wear heels. And Daphne made me promise we'd have cheesecake ."

Deacon's smile got wider. "So we are getting married now?"

Rayna smiled wider, "I mean it is like 20 minutes or so to the magistrate's office…but yeah, if you are okay with that."

Deacon nodded and leaned in to kiss her, "Does this mean I get to see this wedding night…er attire afterwards."

Rayna smiled and let out a, "Maybe" in a long southern drawl. He pulled her closer and looked into her eyes for a minute. His voice was full of wonder when he asked for confirmation one more time.

"We're really getting married?"

Rayna smiled back and looped her arms around his neck. She whispered against his lips, "marry me."

**Macon County Courthouse**

**45 minutes later**

Deacon didn't take his eyes off Rayna as she gazed into his eyes. His voice cracked with emotion, "You are my best friend and you are the only woman I've ever loved." He took a breath of air and continued, "I can't promise you the world but I can promise you are my world. You always have been and you always will be everything to me."

He watched as Rayna's eyes filled with tears and she sniffled. Deacon continued, reminding her of the first time he told her that he loved her and the time they spent a week at the cabin without ever being fully dressed. His eyes turned a deeper shade of blue as he took another breath.

He described seeing her for the first time, "You took my breath away then and you still do now." He brushed a tear from her cheek. "I love you and I cannot wait for you to be my wife."

A buzzer sounded, followed by a steel door opening and closing carrying a police officer and a young guy dressed in orange with handcuffs. If either noticed, they didn't let it on. The magistrate asked if Rayna wanted to say something. She nodded and sniffled, trying to remember how to speak.

"You are my best friend and my partner in everything. You are who I want to wake up beside every morning and go to sleep with every night." She squeezed his hand tighter, "You have this amazing gift of making everyday this exciting adventure and at the same time you give me a peace that ….that makes me feel so safe. I can't even put into words how much I need you and want you. I love you. I love you so much and I can't wait to be married to you." The magistrate said a few words that neither really heard, so lost in each other to care.

The magistrate cleared his throat and asked Deacon to repeat the phrases. Quickly and quietly, they repeated after the elder man, " I, Deacon, take you Rayna, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

Deacon grinned widely as Rayna started to cry. She sniffled again as she repeated the phrases as the magistrate said the words, "" I, Rayna, take you Deacon, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness….and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part."

Deacon blew out the breath he'd been holding. His own eyes filled with tears as he mouthed, "I love you." She smiled through her tears back at him. The magistrate took the rings they'd placed on the Formica counter. The man smiled and told Deacon to place the ring on. Deacon smiled and repeated the magistrate's words, "with this ring, I thee wed." Rayna quickly did the same to him, placing the ring on his finger.

As the magistrate announced "congratulations" Deacon leaned. Rayna happily laughed against his lips as they kissed, "I love you." "I love you too."

**4 Months Later**

Rayna laughed as Deacon kissed her and tilted her back. The thirty or so people seated in the white chairs continued to clap and let out whistles of approval.

They quickly walked down the makeshift aisle, before leaning in to kiss each other again. They broke apart when Deacon felt a tugging on his pant leg. They both turned to see Daphne looking up at them expectantly.

"Guys, you are all in the way and the crowd is getting hungry." Both the bride and the groom laughed as they moved out of the way and allowed the rest of the guests to head into the cabin.

**2 hours later**

Deacon strummed his guitar, sitting on the arm of the chair that Rayna was in. Maddie was seated on the floor near the fireplace following his direction. Gunnar sat down on the opposite couch with Liam as they continued to play old songs.

Juliette hummed against the wall sharing a piece of cake with Daphne. Buck and Tandy were nowhere to be seen and Lamar was sneaking a cigar out back. He could hear Scarlett and his sister Julie talking in the kitchen.

He looked over at Rayna and mouthed an "I love you." She smiled back at him happily. He thought for a moment about how long it had taken him to get married, to be with Rayna again after everything fell apart. As he watched Maddie blush at something Gunnar said tried not to roll his eyes. He smiled happily realizing the journey wasn't over he and Ray, it was just starting.


End file.
